..taking chances..

it takes [two] to tango

2011-03-31T05:34:00.000+08:00

Been there, done that. What else is there to it?
Lost. Entirely.

sane. insane?

2011-03-30T06:11:00.000+08:00

How do one define one's relationship?

A boy + a girl = Relationship?

Nothing is definite. Things change, people change as well. Nothing is forever. How sad but very true! It all boils down to trust, honesty and tolerance. A challenge from Him whom I seek guidance from to light my way. This is much challenging than what I've been through 5 years ago. Nothing comes easy without effort. Endurance.

That's all.

11th month of year 2010

2010-12-09T17:33:00.000+08:00

NOVEMBER.

Long story short, this post will be in point form.

Health deteriotated. Twice sick, 3 medical leaves and 4 times of visit to the doctors. How worst can that be? Wait for it. That's not even the peak yet. Bed-ridden with fever for 3 days. For my 22 years of life, I've NEVER been so sick ever. Guess the job has taken a toll on my body and sad to say, it is prone to illnesses from now on if preventive measures isn't taken accordingly.

Ups & downs at work. My first job; its a whole new experience and a learning ground for me. Come what may, Im just playing my part. Even it wasnt for the department that I was supposed to be working for, at least Im employed. Obviously one has to be open-minded in this area. Afterall, its not the end of the day.

I got my first pay! =)

Managed to celebrate birthdays. Mum's, Louis's & also his mum too.


Louis's cupcakes!

Most importantly, cant wait to head home. Home sweet home. Bad news is, gotta spend CNY 2011 in Singapore. My 1st NOT able to be with family & friends. *sobs*

Last but not least, everytime I say this, its gonna end up the other way round. Christmas is my favourite holiday season of the year, & Im always looking forward to it. So Im seriously refraining myself from saying it out loud BUT I just couldnt contain those excitement whenever I see those beautiful lighted Christmas tress all over the island. *faints*

Tiffany & Co.'s from Sparklette

1.2.3

2010-11-25T22:29:00.000+08:00

That's the number for this post.

Initially, I promised to post up my scraps, but as usual, excuses which leads to procrastination.
Yada yada. What's new.

Its been a month since I've started working now. Difficult in the first place. But regaining momentum as time passes by. And quickly I should say. There's been lots of ups & downs obviously. Its all up to how one make used of the day regardless. As of for now, Im looking forward to CNY 2011 this time round. Home is where the heart is.

That's all for now.

Potrait of an ISFJ

2010-11-06T18:35:00.002+08:00

Found this really interesting post by a friend from Facebook so, decided to give it a try. What am I to loose right. BUT the thing about this kind of test is the minute the analysis comes out based on your answers, one seem to really nod away believing that, IT'S SO TRUE!

Myers Briggs Personality Test MBTI Personality Test

Personality Test

(click the above for the test!)

Then the analysis part: The 16 type Portrait

So here it is of mine which I can say nearly 90% accurate?

Portrait of an ISFJ - Introverted Sensing Feeling Judging
(Introverted Sensing with Extraverted Feeling)

The Nurturer

As an ISFJ, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you takes things in via your five senses in a literal, concrete fashion. Your secondary mode is external, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system.

ISFJs live in a world that is concrete and kind. They are truly warm and kind-hearted, and want to believe the best of people. They value harmony and cooperation, and are likely to be very sensitive to other people's feelings (this part is true enough!). People value the ISFJ for their consideration and awareness, and their ability to bring out the best in others by their firm desire to believe the best.

ISFJs have a rich inner world that is not usually obvious to observers. They constantly take in information about people and situations that is personally important to them, and store it away. This tremendous store of information is usually startlingly accurate, because the ISFJ has an exceptional memory about things that are important to their value systems. It would not be uncommon for the ISFJ to remember a particular facial expression or conversation in precise detail years after the event occured, if the situation made an impression on the ISFJ. (this is why my brain tend to keep 'informations' that are pretty much not needed, at the same time, preventing 'vital' input of informations).

ISFJs have a very clear idea of the way things should be, which they strive to attain. They value security and kindness, and respect traditions and laws. They tend to believe that existing systems are there because they work. Therefore, they're not likely to buy into doing things in a new way, unless they're shown in a concrete way why its better than the established method (I would like to think that its my own personality at fault here, but think twice, many people are of the same).

ISFJs learn best by doing, rather than by reading about something in a book, or applying theory. For this reason, they are not likely to be found in fields which require a lot of conceptual analysis or theory. They value practical application. Traditional methods of higher education, which require a lot of theorizing and abstraction, are likely to be a chore for the ISFJ. The ISFJ learns a task best by being shown its practical application. Once the task is learned, and its practical importance is understood, the ISFJ will faithfully and tirelessly carry through the task to completion. The ISFJ is extremely dependable.

The ISFJ has an extremely well-developed sense of space, function, and aesthetic appeal. For that reason, they're likely to have beautifully furnished, functional homes. They make extremely good interior decorators. This special ability, combined with their sensitivity to other's feelings and desires, makes them very likely to be great gift-givers - finding the right gift which will be truly appreciated by the recipient. (great gift-givers eh?)

More so than other types, ISFJs are extremely aware of their own internal feelings, as well as other people's feelings. They do not usually express their own feelings, keeping things inside. If they are negative feelings, they may build up inside the ISFJ until they turn into firm judgments against individuals which are difficult to unseed, once set. Many ISFJs learn to express themselves, and find outlets for their powerful emotions.

Just as the ISFJ is not likely to express their feelings, they are also not likely to let on that they know how others are feeling (hardly true. I would just burst out to whom Im closed to). However, they will speak up when they feel another individual really needs help, and in such cases they can truly help others become aware of their feelings.

The ISFJ feels a strong sense of responsibility and duty. They take their responsibilities very seriously, and can be counted on to follow through. For this reason, people naturally tend to rely on them. The ISFJ has a difficult time saying "no" when asked to do something, and may become over-burdened. In such cases, the ISFJ does not usually express their difficulties to others, because they intensely dislike conflict, and because they tend to place other people's needs over their own. The ISFJ needs to learn to identify, value, and express their own needs, if they wish to avoid becoming over-worked and taken for granted.

ISFJs need positive feedback from others. In the absence of positive feedback, or in the face of criticism, the ISFJ gets discouraged, and may even become depressed. When down on themselves or under great stress, the ISFJ begins to imagine all of the things that might go critically wrong in their life. They have strong feelings of inadequacy, and become convinced that "everything is all wrong", or "I can't do anything right". (right to the point!)

The ISFJ is warm, generous, and dependable. They have many special gifts to offer, in their sensitivity to others, and their strong ability to keep things running smoothly. They need to remember to not be overly critical of themselves, and to give themselves some of the warmth and love which they freely dispense to others. (a change for a better good. indeed!)

Jungian functional preference ordering:

Dominant: Introverted Sensing
Auxilliary: Extraverted Feeling
Tertiary: Introverted Thinking
Inferior: Extraverted Intuition

when lainey meets gracie.

2010-10-21T04:30:00.002+08:00

It's girlfriend day's out.

Mind you NOT just any girlfriend day BUT bestest girlfriend one could ever have. Ironically, its only in Lion City that we could shop to our hearts content. The last I could remember of our shopping spree was back in Pavilion, KL where she was coerced or you can say 'forced' by me to parade with all the shopping bags just for a picture. Memories. It was happy fun time back then. I shop, she shopped too, we both did. It seems so yesterday. Fast forward. I guess its much more convenient over here mainly of transportation. And we could shop forever! Whenever these two girls go together, its HAVOC!!

Gracie was teased to have shop from Taiwan all the way to Singapore. Haha. Funny statement by her mum. It does really seems to be the situation here! Im just glad to be with her, spending time yapping away. Oh boy, Im already missing her.

Our day started with Bugis Street or rather hers to begin with. And the amount of shopping bags, let's not get started with that. When I was to meet her, she was ALREADY trying out a pair of shoe. Im completely baffled when she told me that it was not her first purchase for the day! Crazy woman! Haha. However, it was not the purchase that matters BUT the course of action in purchasing. As the saying goes, "Its not the destination that matters, rather the journey". True indeed. Lunging all her goods, we decided to head back to the hotel to unload those shopping goodies as we're supposed to head off to MBS. Its not really appropriate to carry those bags all around and before MBS, a quick detour for scraps. There goes another baggage there. Eventually, the rain starts pouring but it didnt hold us back as Miss I-Saved-The-Day here coincidentally brought an umbrella along so we're able to continue the journey throughout. Exciting I must say.

The evening was mostly spent in the casino and guess what? It's my first time of 22 years going to casinos; not one but TWO in 2 consecutive days. On top of that, a winning of S$20. All thanks to hun. We had so much fun just like two little girl. It was truly awesome where no words can ever describe it. Im already anticipating the next visit. Soon okay? =)

it shall always be

2010-10-09T01:15:00.001+08:00

Life's ever so contradicting.

That's it for me for the time being. A few months back, mood swings, frustration is all that was clouding me. At last when the prayers answered, I have this mixed feeling inside me now. Nevertheless, spending 2 months staying with another family truly brings me warmth inside out. First, I get to be with the boyfriend all the time. Seeing him off to work, waiting for him to come home. That's my daily routine. Well, part of it. Now that Im leaving for home (even for a few days!), its all sappy once more. Moreover, with the rostered schedule for the both of us, Im skeptical about how often we could see each other later. Yes, I admit that indeed Im a pessimist. Living together with someone who's already a part of the family, in which being apart seems so grey. How I wish this wont come sooner.

Sometimes, one is too busy getting on with their daily activities and its not until when one sat down to ponder around, only when life's just too precious. Day by day, it passes by. Days to weeks and to months. Without realizing, I've been slacking for nearly 10 months now. Ah~ life's truly a bliss. For me, its definitely the other way around as Im mostly painstakingly trying to fill up my day with what to do, who to meet, yada yada and now that the REAL thing finally starts sinking in, Im equally depressed as I was before. Life! As contradicting as it could be. To begin with, I havent even started packing yet for home later at 11am, hoping that time could slow down. This is how denial I am right now, hoping that I could turn back time and relieve those moments back again. Every week, I only look forward to the boyfriend's off day. That's when we could really go out and just forget about everything else. Being the considerate girlfriend *ahem* sometimes, things dont work out according to plan as its unevitable. With the workload and the amount of hours put in, one would surely hope to sleep all day long and do nothing! Its all about give and take. Tolerance's the key here. Nevertheless, I sure did had some fun time with sweetie. He's a small kid at heart and never fails to irritate me regardless in which teasing each other everyday's the way we amused ourselves. Welcome to my relationship where every small detail counts. It may not be all rosy as every couple do have their own ups and downs BUT I tend to remember those happy moments of ours. =)

a breathe of life~

2010-10-03T02:25:00.000+08:00

FINALLY!

The revamp of my blog is too my liking at this state. Managed to pull through painstackingly. Phew!
Many bumps selecting a desirable layout/theme in which MUST suit to the selective taste of mine. FYI, IM THAT PICKY! OF EVERY SINGLE THING! So, as you can see, here's the BETTER layout of my blog. Hope it will stay for as long as it could be. Having to edit those HTML codes really kills me! With a lil bit of luck here and there, I managed to edit it according to how I want it to be. Colours especially. Whoever who created this layout, seriously! All white for the convenience? Gah. With a lil click through Google!, its a miracle for me to get through it all. Then there's a few additions to the site. (hint: sidebar) So tell me what you think?

That's it for now. Next up on my scrapbooking collections in which has become a major addiction.

Have a great Sunday.

just when you have too much time in hand..

2010-09-08T00:25:00.008+08:00

Photo Booth is really addictive. It makes one takes silly pictures not just per take but FOUR at once in merely seconds. You wont even have time to think of what pose/expression of your face. This is where the fun is. Its so silly, Im gonna dieeeee...!! =)

Its only part of the collections that I have. This is the thermal effect. Of course my favourite would be sepia, but nevertheless, I've tried those presentable ones (black & white, normal).
FUN FUN FUN! As the title says it all, "Just when you have too much time in hand". About the rest, its a lil too private so, bear with the above ya.

Oh well, this is a total random post. Time to scrap again. Ideas ideas. Its about time it flocks in now. Aiming for something simpler this time round. We shall see how it pans out. Despite the budget, Made With Love products are tempting as usual. With the weekly product, one doesnt need an excuse to go shopping for scraps. Scrap shopping!!

Another picture I find amusing.

*Hello Panda with millk..? Interesting!*

Its another long weekend. With the Raya holidays, it makes me wanna go home and just spend time with families. Hmm. Oh well. Guess that's all for now. Enjoy your weekend.

p/s: Woody pie's REALLY ILL. He's falling apart now. Even the boyfriend agrees that its time to let him go. AND Im gonna hafta do the dirty work. Sobs. NOT until I get a replacement.

p.p/s: my insomnia picture of another post went *POOF* again!!! probably due to copyright. GAH!

via icanread

112

2010-09-02T06:38:00.006+08:00

SUPPOSEDLY if you’ve seen over 70 films, you have no life. Mark the ones you’ve seen. There are 240 films on this list. Copy this list and paste this on your blog. Then, put x’s next to the films you’ve seen, add them up, change the header adding your number, and click post at the bottom. Have fun.

Teen/ Romance:
(x) A Cinderella Story
( ) Another Cinderella Story
() Step Up
() Step Up 2
(x) High School Musical it was once upon a time.
(x) High School Musical 2
(x) High School Musical 3
( ) Hannah Montana Movie
(x) Enchanted
() Sydney White
Total: 5

(x) She’s the Man. oh yeah! loosely based on Shakspeare's Twelfth Night. Plus, Amanda Bynes ROCKS!
( ) Licensed to Wed
(x) The Break-up
(x) 13 going on 30
(x) 27 Dresses official screening on 27 March. Need I say more?
() P.S I Love You THE MOST BORING SHOW EVER!
(x) Made of Honour
(x) What Happens in Vegas funny shit!
(x) Get Smart even funnier!
( ) The Princess Brides
Total: 7

( ) Camp Rock
( ) Wild Child
( ) Ella Enchanted
(x) The Princess Diaries Julie Andrew couldnt be more cool as a grandmother! =)
(x) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
(x) 50 First Dates Drew Barrymore totally nailed it.
( ) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Hotel For Dogs
( ) Just Married
(x) Freaky Friday
Total: 4

(x) The Hot Chick when it comes to Rob Schneider, there's no escape.
( ) Sleepover
(x) Confessions Of a Shopaholic
(x) Twilight purely accidental movie which in turn makes me want more!
( ) Nancy Drew
(x) The Devil Wears Prada Miranda Priestly: "That's all!"
( ) No Reservations
( ) Perfect Man
( ) Australia
() Never Been Kissed
Total: 4

Comedy/Humour:
( ) Yes Man
(x) Bedtime Stories
(x) The Pink Panther
(x) The Pink Panther 2
(x) Marley & Me agonizing at the beginning but it turns out okay.
( ) Cheetah Girls
( ) Cheetah Girls 2
( ) Bratz
(x) The Haunted Mansion
(x) Paul Blart Mall Cop
Total: 6

( ) The 40-year-old virgin
(x) Night in the Museum
(x) Night in the Museum 2
() Evan Almighty
() Bruce Almighty
(x) White Chicks SO watching this again!
( ) Neverending Story
(x) Meet the Spartans
(x) Meet the Parents
(x) Meet the Fockers
Total: 6

() Scream
( ) Scream 2
( ) Scream 3
(x) Scary Movie
(x) Scary Movie 2
() Scary Movie 3
(x) Scary Movie 4
(x) American Pie
(x) American Pie 2
(x) American Pie Band Camp
Total: 6

Adventures:
(x) Harry Potter 1: The Sorcerer’s Stone
(x) Harry Potter 2: The Chamber of Secrets
(x) Harry Potter 3: Prisoner of Azkaban
(x) Harry Potter 4: Goblet of Fire
(x) Harry Potter 5: Order of the Phoenix
(x) Harry Potter 6: Half-Blood Prince
( ) Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring
( ) Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
( ) Lord of the Rings: Return Of the King
() Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
(x) Chronicles Of Narnia: Prince Caspian
Total: 7

( ) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
() Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
( ) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
(x) Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull
(x) The Mummy
(x) The Mummy 2
(x) The Mummy 3
(x) Journey to the Centre of Earth
( ) City of Ember
( ) Finding Neverland
Total: 5

(x) Pirates of the Caribbean who could resist the eccentricity of Jack Sparrow?
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man’s Chest
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean 3: At World’s End
(x) X-Men
(x) X-2
(x) X-3
(x) Spider-Man
(x) Spider-Man 2
(x) Spider-Man 3
( ) King Kong
Total: 9

(x) Hellboy
(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(x) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
(x) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
( ) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
() Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
() Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
( ) Underdog
( ) A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(x) Batman: The Dark Knight
Total: 5

Action/ Thriller:
(x) The Matrix
( ) The Matrix Reloaded
( ) The Matrix Revolution
(x) Terminator
(x) Terminator 2
(x) Terminator 3
(x) Ocean’s Eleven
(x) Ocean’s Twelve
(x) Ocean’s Thirteen
(x) Casino Royale 007
Total: 8

( ) Bourne Identity
( ) Bourne Supremacy
( ) Underworld
( ) Butterfly Effect
( ) Death Note
( ) Death Note 2
( ) Death Note 3: L Change the world
( ) Resident Evil 1
( ) Resident Evil 2
( ) I, Robot
Total: 0

(x) Rush Hour
(x) Rush Hour 2
(x) Rush Hour 3
(x) Mission Impossible 1
(x) Mission Impossible 2
(x) Mission Impossible 3
(x) I Am Legend
() Predator I
() Predator II
() Signs
Total: 7

Horror:
() Saw
() Saw II
() Saw III
() Saw IV
(x) Saw V GRUELSOME!
(x) The Grinch horror?!! which part?
() Texas Chainsaw Massacre
() Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
() The Ring
() The Ring 2
Total: 2

() Final Destination
() Final Destination 2
(x) Final Destination 3
() Ghost Ship
() From Hell
(x) Child’s Play nightmarish!
(x) Seed of Chucky
(x) Bride of Chucky
(x) Gothika
(x) Nightmare on Elm Street
Total: 6

(x) The Grudge
(x) The Grudge 2
( ) The Haunted Apartment
( ) Siren
( ) Silent Hill
(x) The Hills Have Eyes
(x) The Mask
() Son Of The Mask
() Alone
() Omen
() House Of Wax
Total: 4

() The Eye
() The Eye 2
(x) Shutter my favourite all time movie ever!
() When a Stranger calls
(x) The Fog
() The Orphanage
() The Skulls
() Cruel Intentions
() Cruel Intentions 2
() House of 1000 Corpses
Total: 2

Cartoons:
(x) Lilo & Stitch
(x) Ice Age
(x) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
(x) Madagascar
(x) Madagascar 2
(x) Kung Fu Panda
( ) Bolt
(x) Wall-E
(x) Monsters Inc
(x) Shark Tale
Total: 9 (Im a cartoon girl!)

(x) Shrek
(x) Shrek 2
(x) Shrek 3
() Finding Nemo
(x) ET
() Cars
() Ratatouille
(x) Toy Story
(x) Toy Story 2
(x) The Incredibles EDNA MODE!!
Total: 7

Inspirational:
( ) Little Miss Sunshine
( ) I Am Sam
( ) The Day After Tomorrow
(x) Coach Carter
( ) Save The Last Dance
( ) To Kill A Mockingbird
( ) Conrack
( ) Midnight Sun
( ) Little Black Book
( ) Rwanda Genocide
Total: 1

Classics:
(x) Ten Things I Hate About You
(x) Titanic
( ) Romeo & Juliet
( ) Frankenstein
( ) A Midsummer Night’s Dream
Total: 2

112 movies! Why does watching more than 70 movies make ME lifeless. Nah!

Joys of laughter

2010-08-10T02:15:00.016+08:00

It's another I've-neglected-my-blog-for-too-long-that-it's-growing-spidey-web starters. This MAYBE or MIGHT NOT be a long draggy post all in one. So, we shall see how it goes from here.

To start things of *pause* ... Where should I begin? Aah. Well, there's quite a number of events that took place. Might be leaving out the what-happened-to-the-SIA-interview? content. It's too depressing to even mention it, let alone talking about it. SO yeah. Skip that. Oh wait. Not just that interview, but the other interview that initially brought me over to Merlion city. Skipping that too.

And what else is there to write about since Im avoiding all the above.

Well, there's a steamboat gathering in which the boyfriend initiated. Sort of like a welcome back to Singapore again kinda thing. That's very sweet & thoughtful. It's my assumption so let's just let it be that way! As they say, a picture paints a thousand words, so enjoy many pictures of many words.

Lovely steamboat outing but it was quite a short one. Enjoyed the pre & post steamboat actually. Most important, Michelle was there! That was the fun part. Looking forward to another outing. Shall check with Miss Organizer (Dawn).

THIS is totally random! Besides Jude Law & Johnny Depp, I ADORE Dominic Monaghan! His first appearance on me was on tv drama Lost. Though I never gave much thought about him, gradually over time, he's appearing more often on the media channel. Don't get me wrong, I DONT watch Lost. It was just some advertisement of the tv show one fine day and that was only a glimpse. Few months back, the boyfriend was watching this show call Flash Forward where John Cho's plays one of the prominent character in it & guess what, there's Dominic! Initially I wasnt interested AT ALL BUT while the boyfriend's watching, I cant help but to watched a lil here and there! OH MY! He's totally HOT! With his accent and clean shaven 'botak' look, Im completely smitten! Haha. Then he has to dress so smartly with a hat (if Im not mistaken!). A lookalike Justin Timberlake minus the height. Attractively, he lost a finger (pinky) too. Yes, Im sick but completely reasonable for liking him as compared to Jude & Johnny. Then it was this video of Eminem featuring Rihanna that I happened to stumble across a friend's friend's friend's blog with Dominic & Megan FOX!! Wowza! =D

Not only that, I told the boyfriend about Dominic jokingly that I would wanna substitute him with Dominic! Haha. It's kinda like our thing. More to me actually! Goofing most of the time. It's so fun. He was like, "NO! Cause you're mine". Or something similar. Isn't he cute! Of course its the boyfriend Im talking about. And that's what I love about him! Love you much sweetie! =)

Oh and we had dim sum breakfast one fine day! It was supposed to be a drinking session but time passes by quickly and the next thing, we ended up at Lau Pa Sat. Wondering our way through the CBD area at Raffles & luckily we weren't lost! CBD area isn't his thing as he puts it. Haha. Despite all that, it was sumptuos meal! Love breakfast so much but sadly morning isnt my thing! Im STILL looking forward to Yum Cha! Dim sum buffet! Yums~

Look! It's the 20th month of 10.twelve. This time I got those months right! 4 more to 2 years. Frustrating enough, I cant scrap on time this time! Couldnt find one decent picture let alone pictures for this month's scrap! ARGH! Why does it happen all the time? With my enthusiasm mood on; ideas flowing in, then the blockage has to show up somewhere somehow! In the end, admitting to defeat, all fummed up; task not done! How not to feel URGH?!! *sigh*

Quote:
If you're a scrapbooker, you're creative-period! You may not always feel it. I certainly don't!

p/s: Is it long enough? First post for August.

oh so sleepy..

2010-07-25T16:42:00.004+08:00

via myheartonmysleeves

EDIT: WTF HAPPENED TO MY PICTURE..?!! FML!

knocking through the cottage door of Surrey..

2010-07-25T02:48:00.007+08:00

"I have found almost everything ever written about love...to be true. Shakespeare said, journeys end in lover's meeting. Oh what an extraordinary thought. Personally, I have not experience anything remotely close to that BUT Im more than willing to believe Shakespeare had. I supposed I think about love more than anyone really should. Im constantly amazed by its shear power to alter and define our lives. It was Shakespeare who also said that love is blind. Now that is something i know to be true".

"For some, quite inexplicably...love fades. For others, love is simply lost. But of course, love could also be found even if just for the night".

"And then there's another kind of love. The cruelest kind. The one that almost kills it victims. Its call 'unrequited love'. Of that I am an expert. Most love stories are about people who fall in love with each other, but what about the rest of us? What about our stories? Those of us who fall in love alone. We are the victims of the one-sided affair. We are the cursed of the love one. We are the unlove ones-the walking wounded, the handicapped without the advantage of a great parking space. Yes, you are looking at one such individual. And I have willingly love that man for over THREE miserable years. The absolute worst years of my life. The worst Christmases, the worst birthdays, New Years eve brought in by tears and valium. These years that I've been in love, have been the darkest days of my life. All because I've been cursed by being in love with a man who does not and will not love me back! Oh God! Just the sight of him-heart-pounding, throat thickening, absolutely cant swallow.
All the usual symptoms".

Iris Simpkins. The Holiday, 2006.

The above monlogue opening is from one of the most loved and one of my favourite holiday season's movie. It never fails to have me going all awe and melts right down that very moment. Given that The Holiday featured Jude Law, its extra special. Need I say more? The reason behind all the whole text above is dedicated to a very similar situation in which happened to a very close girlfriend of mine. She has been in a troubled dilemma relationship in which had not seen to be fruitful and rewarding as she should deserve it. Short to say, she's just one amazing woman but sorry to say at the same time that the guy is just not worthy of her every actions. Well, love is blind. A third party cant exactly tell someone in love to act rationally and think with your head rather than following your heart. It's intagible-emotions, feelings that is. All I can really contribute is by letting her know that no matter what, I'll be right here, where I'll always stand by her side, through thick and thin. Regardless of anything (that includes distances), you'll be able to reach out to me & vice versa. My arms are wide open just for you. Keep that in mind.

From the bottom of my heart, I wish happiness finds you soon enough. Huggles~

a unusual saturday

2010-07-22T01:03:00.007+08:00

This event took place on a particular Saturday alone together with the brother while waiting at the car wash area. While flipping through the pages, scanning lazily across the title, this article caught my attention wide open right that moment, completely. Without much further ado:

The Customer No Longer King
by Seah Chiang Nee of the column Insight Down South (Saturday; July 17, 2010)

Courteous service workers are a dying breed, and the cause lies in Singaporean characteristics, be it the worker, the boss or overdemanding customer

AS its new generation becomes more cosmopolitan, self-centred and seemingly always in a hurry, Singapore is finding it harder to develop a good service culture on its own.

Many educated youths are shunning jobs that involve serving customers day after day, just as their fathers stayed away from menial labour.

Both generations have had to adopt the same solution – a mass intake of foreign workers to fill the gap and raise standards.

Thousands of Filipino, Malaysian and Chinese service workers have been recruited.

With the economy turning red hot, another 100,000 more foreigners are needed, according to the government.

Most will go to the service sector.

During the last two years, there has been an upsurge in complaints about customer service in areas such as retail, food and beverage, and education.

Recently, a customer reportedly found that he and his friends had been served from a badly diluted bottle of liquor, and the waitress refused to take the drinks back – until he threatened to call the police.

In central Singapore, an irate customer found lackadaisical service workers in a cafe, carrying out a conversation among themselves, while customers waited.

And a shopper in a large 24-hour department store had to wake up a worker sleeping on duty, and who promptly directed him to find another employee to serve him.

Other complaints, reported in Stomp, a social site, included:

A Chinese woman restaurant manager video-filmed shouting at a group of customers, and even trying to hit them when they complained about poor service.
A customer being shocked to find a plastic bit in her water chestnut drink; when approached, a company staff member reacted rudely.
Confronted about poor food quality, a service staff member of a Japanese restaurant on the east coast told the diners: “You won’t die from eating rotten mussels and fish head.”
An electronic shop attendant using an expletive on a French customer when a disparity was found between the price and the invoice issued.

The bad hats also include lowly-paid foreigners.

It is not always possible for a visitor to distinguish one from the other since ‘aliens’ now make up almost 40% of the population.

As of December last year, some 508,000 foreigners made up a quarter of the state’s 2,000,000-strong service force.

A popular verdict is that service workers from the Philippines, Malaysia, Myanmar, Sri Lanka and sometimes China, are better at service than Singaporeans.

“They are generally friendlier and react coolly to trouble,” commented a country club member, referring to its restaurant’s half a dozen Manila-recruited staffs.

Why is customer service declining?

According to the manager of a top hotel, this could be due to Singaporeans becoming high achievers in the academic field.

As a result, many now considered service jobs as below them.

There are many other reasons, depending on who you talk to.

The consensus of the fault lies in Singaporean characteristics, be it the worker, the boss or over-demanding customer.

Others blame it on poor pay, over-crowdedness and rude customers as well as having too many cheap, poor quality outsiders who can’t communicate well with customers.

To begin with, few Singaporeans are born with a service culture that includes having a patient and humble disposition.

While Singaporeans are disciplined and hard-working, many of them lack a spontaneously friendly attitude that one finds in Bangkok and Tokyo.

This is absent here not only in workers but many employers, too.

And, of course, the rude and over-demanding customers.

A retail executive told me: “Many Singaporeans have let success get to their heads; they become arrogant, insensitive and too self-important to do well in the service business.”

Several years ago, a Readers Digest survey rated Singapore in the bottom 10 of the world’s most courteous cities – behind Manila, Bangkok, Hong Kong and Jakarta – despite help received from high-tech conveniences.

There have been recent improvements in several areas under the weight of government efforts and money put into service training.

The World Economic Forum ranked Singapore 10th in customer service on its 2008 Global Competitiveness Report, up from 15th in 2006 and 2007.

In perspective, the problem is only affecting some segments of the service sector, which is vast, making up 70% of the economy.

The two million service workers especially in the civil service and the large corporations are generally motivated and efficient.

In fact, the poor examples seem to run counter to the well-managed bureaucracy and state infrastructures like the harbour, airport and hospitals.

The main problem lies in the thousands of small shops and restaurants, where workers are comparatively low-paid and ill-trained.

What about poor services caused by rude customers, asked a Yahoo forum which solicited public views on the subject.

“By and large, customers are arrogant and demanding. They think because they are here to spend their money, they should be treated like kings,” a surfer said.

Another added: “The typical Singaporean is discourteous, very impatient, so it is hard to serve them well.”

Writer Adam said that customer service in Singapore is generally bad and may not improve without the boss taking the lead because “workers have very little sense of ownership in their work”.

It is tourism and hotels – crucial for Singapore’s future – that could suffer most if there are no improvements, affecting Singaporeans and visitors alike.

A society that is short on common courtesy, it is feared, may eventually lose out in the competition for global tourists.

killing me softly & slowly

2010-07-19T19:55:00.004+08:00

The following event happened between 10am - 11am on the 19th July 2010.

Eyes wide open, overlooking across the room wondering of the time. The ray of sunlight piercing through the window on the far left of the other corner of the room was agonizing. It has been a mere 5 hours of sleep without much disruption but ended up wide awake. Weird. Freaky. Automatically, I reached for, what has deemed to be a norm straight after one wake's up, the phone. No messages. Another usual for me. Message sent and replied after the first gets a reply. DONE!

Then it leaves me wide awake for the next hour despite the hours of sleep Im getting. Cranky. What a torturing hour that is. The thoughts just wouldnt give it a rest again. Its like tsunami all over my mind with questions and statements bouncing of the wall of my pea brain. Traumatizing!

"Was it worth it?". "Am I giving in too much that in the end, all that is was being taken for granted?". Is that it? "Where does the attentiveness disappeared to?" "Nowadays, its all about work and responsibility that other 'thing' else gets neglected". "I feel so annoyed with myself for pestering with all the sweet nothings messages". "Remind me, why am I going through such ordeal, where I could just stay put as to where I belong". Isn't it. "Why do I have to do this, and deep down, I know why even not wanting to admit it out loud".

Relatively, I cracked. What's wrong right? Well, everything is. I was so sure of what I wanted, going along with my head instead of the heart, lands me on very uncomfortable ground. Well, no pain no gain right? The pain is no longer felt as its already numbed. And then, I began questioning myself of the choice I made. No longer able to stand on two feet, the pressure literally tears me apart beyond recognizable. Why do I put myself through such trouble and daunting journey to secure an occupation in a foreign country? Probably the stubbornness, the ego for wanting more of that I could actually sustain. As the saying goes, "the grass is always greener on the other side". Is it now?

Sometimes, the towel is ready to be thrown in! Im done. That's it. I give up. Those 3 words.
Im a quitter. So I should just quit. When the situation is deem one-sided, nothing else matters anymore. The ray of light at the end of the tunnel has grown a little dimmer with merely just a flicker. Pitch black, wondering the way around with the hurdles in front. I just dont know how to cope on anymore. Sadly, there isnt any strength left in me given that the falling downs bruises me along the way. Badly and deeply hurt throughout the process. No longer has the heart and mentality as strong as before, it has become truly fragile. Fragile in terms of a single nudge, could break it into pieces, beyond repairable. Nothing is ever the same again.

Tired. Really tired.

wherever, whenever, whatever!

2010-07-08T01:54:00.002+08:00

It has been nearly half a year, yet, here I am, without any purpose in life.
A new chapter begins as the previous one ended.
I find myself floating in an ocean, exceedingly vast, sometimes to a drowning point.
Survival kicks in?

It all boils down to egotistical somehow.
Not wanting to end up somewhere unknown, beyond recognition.
Even if its the beginning,
nothing beats a good start, aiming for absolute perfection.

Hence, leaving me all fummed up, unproductive at the same time.
Wondering when will I see light.
Or was it the half-heartedly, little effort searching for jobs,
leads to an increase in anxiety, sense of helplessness, shame, lack of self confidence and uncertainty of the future.

something to ponder..

2010-06-20T17:10:00.004+08:00

This is for you hun. =)

Chapter 48 of Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

EDITED 12.03am, 21st June

… I exhale hotly through my nose, bull-like.
"Groceries," Richard say, "listen to me. Someday you're gonna look back on this moment of your life as such a sweet time of grieving. You'll see that you were in mourning and your heart was broken, but your life was changing and you were in the best possible place in the world for it - in a beautiful place of worship, surrounded by grace. Take this time, every minute of it. Let things work themselves out here in India."
"But I really loved him."
“Big deal. So you fell in love with someone. Don’t you see what happened? This guy touched a place in your heart deeper than you thought you were capable of reaching, I mean you got zapped, kiddo. But that love you felt, that’s just the beginning. You just got a taste of love. That’s just limited little rinky-dink mortal love. Heck, Groceries – you have the capacity to someday love the whole world. It’s your destiny. Don’t laugh.”…

p/s: Groceries referring to the author herself by one of her friend.

the long awaited day =)

2010-06-20T01:00:00.004+08:00

Its the Brash Basah post! Long story. =)

You might wonder, what's up with this particular MRT station. To be honest, I dont even know the reason myself. Perhaps, it can be classified as 'love at first sight'. It was back in 2008 where I spotted this station on my favourite bus (190) ride to work everyday. Given that I was still a 'tourist' then, I couldnt help but wonder out loud. "Just one of those many MRT stations? But it looks deserted." Plus, it wasnt the usual MRT stations of any colours (red, purple, red) that I know of. Ever since then, passing by Bras Basah leaves me pondering most of the time.

Not until a year later only the Circle Line was announced officially. So, that was what Bras Basah was all about. One of those MRT stations on Circle Line (yellow line). =) Oh jolly good. I cant wait to actually 'pay a visit' to the familiar yet unfamiliar MRT station. I do find myself weird sometimes. Afterall, its just A STATION right? Well, not everyone's normal, are they?

So, just like any 3-year old kid who's excited to go on a trip (e.g zoo), the boyfriend and I made our way to Bras Basah through Dhoby Ghaut Interchange and voila! We're actually there! What else right? Picture time! =) As seen above, there's this REALLY long escalator heading up towards the exit point. Compared to the one at ION shopping mall, you're looking at the winner here!

Cant help but gaze in awe for a moment and decided to have myself snapped riding through it. How awesome can that be?! Very!

Thanks sweetie for keeping your promise! At least its one done, 3 to go? Or was it 4? See! You've got so many promises made to me! Huggles~ It was such an exciting day! That place was a lil too quiet. Seems to me like a museum! Nevertheless, it's all worth it by just having you with me. Too bad the exit was not where I thought we would end up at. Maybe next time? =)

humour me please..?

2010-06-16T19:38:00.007+08:00

This is so irrelevant but Im too bored (since when Im not lately, right?) so, Cougar Town was like my caffeine and now that its over, its killing me wanting for more ever since Ugly Betty got canceled and all the other series has ended its season. The trailer on AXN really caught my attention to this really hilarious tv series! Im still thinking about Parenthood though. We'll see.

Im telling you, Cougar Town is some funny shit. Haha. I've never laughed out loud so hard on any tv series, not even Desperate Housewives or Ugly Betty although most would agree its boring! Gah! Keep that thought to yourself. This is way wittier. Give it a chance.

This nieghbourhood-family thing is so dysfunctional but the fun never stops! Everyone's mean to each other one way or another but hey, no hard feelings! Its all about the cold hard truth and stuffs. Haha. Nice one. Have fun watching. =)

p/s: GAC- Guilty As Charged

how true is it..?

2010-06-11T05:29:00.006+08:00

You by the light
Is the greatest find
In a world full wrong you're the thing that's right
Finally made it through the lonely to the other side

You said it again my heart's in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark,
And I'm in love and I'm terrified.
For the first time in the last time
In my only life.

This could be good
It's already better than last
And love is worse than knowing
You're holding back
I could be all that you needed
If you let me try

You said it again my hearts in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
I'm at the edge of my emotions
Watching the shadows burning in the dark
And I'm in love and I'm terrified
For the first time in the last time
in my only

I only said it cause i mean it
I only mean cause it's true
So don't you doubt what i've been dreaming
Cause it fills me up and holds me close
Whenever I'm without you

You said it again my hearts in motion
Every word feels like a shooting star
Watching the shadows burning in the dark
And I'm in love and I'm terrified
For the first time in the last time
In my only life

what shall i do?

2010-06-09T23:01:00.002+08:00

Movies that Im dying to watched but am gonna missed it. Or should I say that, I only hope to watch with the boyfriend..? Oh well...

The Karate Kid

Toy Story 3

Eclipse (possible!)

=(

drained out!

2010-06-07T05:04:00.002+08:00

IF only technologies were at my fingertips. I swear, I could've type this entry out with all that's going through my mind right now. Sadly, Im emotionally, mentally and physically drained out. Surprisingly, my body isnt reacting the same way although the brain's calling out for a good night rest! Recently, I realize that Im good in withholding what the body is telling me to do. Believe me, it's NOT a good sign! It all has to come out somehow. No point suppressing it all inside. Well, I shall continue this another day or perhaps when Im able to get the hang of that mood once more. Right. Like I said, it should've been immediately, right when the 'inspirations' comes pouring in.

We shall see about that ya.

Goodnight.

ICT

2010-06-02T17:55:00.003+08:00

It was right after I decided to hit the sack, the thought of blogging presented itself at the most inconvenient hour. How great is that? Or Im just that weird..? Half an hour ago (4am) , before sleeping, I was happily you-tubing and exhausting myself to feel tired and eventually get to bed. But it had to happen right before I close my eyes and at the same time telling my pea-brain to SHUT UP! Without the help of my prayers, insomnia is definitely taking all my beauty sleep away leaving me zombie-fied! Gah!

Anyway, back to the post (got distracted too easily now!), you might wonder what ICT means! Well, for those who had served their National Service in Singapore, Im sure you're pretty familiar with this abbreviation already. So, as I was saying, it merely stands for In-Camp-Training. Its meant for those who had completed their NS but yet still have to report back to camp every year till the age of 40 I guess? Well, Im not familiar with some parts of it, but well, that's not the main issue here. *distracted again* The boyfriend is on ICT this 2 weeks. And sadly, he's staying in camp!! It was supposed to be a night or two but yeah, this time, it's a lil different and UNEXPECTED! =( Come what may, I'll take it as it comes! Fortunately, the boyfriend's able to booked out yesterday for a couple of hours but its sad to see him leave all over again. Never mind! Shall wait for tomorrow and the day after! =D Due to his absence, it contributes much to my sleepless nights as well where 'my pal' decides to pay me a visit too. Urgh! Go away. I dont need you! Ish.

Besides the boyfriend's absence, it got me thinking too. As in everything starts to link up and suddenly you have so much to think about before you sleep! Torture! Those were the days that I remembered about 2 couples who used to hang out whenever possible. As in friend's girlfriend IS always fun to be with. I really missed those times. Haha. Double date! Its no longer the case ever since the split up. Although we were never that close but I liked her company. Its too bad and so sad on how it ended. (hun claimed that its her phrase! =b) Just memories of it.

p/s: Counting down days to meet sweetie =)
p.p/s: NOT looking forward for Sunday this time! =(
p.p.p/s: Dim sum and Pixar exhibition please!!!! *sad face*

weekly update..

2010-05-29T03:57:00.006+08:00

The desire to blog earlier while taking the night rider isn't the same now. Well, it happens all the time whenever the urge felt strong enough to even compiled all there is for this entry and despite the lack of availability and accessibility puts a stop to whatever there is in my pea brain. Pen down your thoughts. That's true enough but sadly, it isn't that most of the time, hence, Im doing my best here now.

It's that week again, before leaving for home. It's been nearly not one but three amazing weeks! Longest so far and enjoying every minutes and seconds of it! It's priceless for the company and day spent with different individuals, especially this week itself. The overwhelming feeling took me completely that I've to recall what actually happened for a while back then. It was that much of fun to begin with.

First, Gracie make a impromptu decision to have a shopping getaway here! Given that I've managed to spent time with her the last time, but she was so touristy during the New Year's eve holiday. Not to mention, she has company with her. Somehow, this time was quite different even though she was with a bunch of friends. More towards the tagging along kind. Nevermind that. Long story short, we managed to had awesome time given the sneaked out here and there of alone time spent together getting stuffs for work! The best shopping experience I had with a girlfriend in the heart of Singapore! What more can a girl ask for. There was just so much of fun; just the two of us! How often do we shop this way right? Im just glad we did meet up and the rest its history. We shall have more of this shopping outings soon! Yes. You just managed to crack me up laughing, enjoying every moment and not forgetting countless nonsense all day long! See. Im missing you already! That reminds me, please make yourself available for Sex in The City 2!! Details later.

With the remaining week, the boyfriend's going for reservist. Hopefully there'll be time for us. The thought of it makes me sad in tears by just thinking of not seeing you for God-knows-how-long again! For the past few weeks, the eagerness in awaiting for your return from work is all I looked forward too. Having to part for work results in counting down the hours wondering when you'll get home. Short to say, this daily routine has grown accustom to me as Im not sure how to adapt when Im without you. It pains a lot. Having someone to come home to really makes your day and it does for me as well. I just don't want that to go away. Huggles~ I'm missing you all the time. Shall be patient in awaiting my retun for good! The parting sucks to the max! ={

100th post tribute to the boyfriend =)

2010-05-25T00:42:00.007+08:00

About him:
His Birthday: 15th November
How long have you been together? em, let's see.. 15months & 15 days?
How long did you know each other before you got together? a month or 2 perhaps? things happened so quickly back then with a couple of hiccups.. *wink*
What physical features attracted you to him first?: definitely his s.m.i.l.e!
Hair color: Coffee black!
Hair style: its neither flat nor too spiky..?! hmm..go figure!
How did you meet? well, you know the story.. a boy meets a girl, they attract each other & the rest, its history! =D

RELATIONSHIP STUFF
How serious is it: VERY! =)
Are you in love?: duh! of course! (do you sweetie?)
Do your parents like him: they show no objections, so yes!
Does it matter?: absolutely!
Do you trust him? he has my complete trust! so, dont betray that! =b
Does he let you wear his pants? not so much, but I did though! *blush*
Do you have a shirt of his that you sleep with? sadly no!!! ={
Do you like the way he smells: definitely not the after-work smell! besides that, Im okay.
Can you picture having kids with him: yes yes! adorable kids like baby Axel! =D
What bothers you the most about him: he tends to go all quiet and stuffs during an argument! that bugs me a lot! =X
Does he have a temper? Im sure he does!
Are you happy to be with him: what kind of question is this..?!!
Does he embarrass you in public: well, I must say, he's a gentleman. =)

SOME OTHER STUFF
Does he have any piercings?: yes yes! both ears! oh and a labret too..
Does he have any scars that you know of?: em, well, I gave him one..does that count too?
Is he a party dude or stay at home kind of guy?: more towards a piggy-bum kind of guy! =X
Is he Outgoing or Shy? he used to be shy, but outgoing mostly..? or he is still shy?
Does he love his mama? I believe he's a mummy's boy! =D
Would he hang out with you and YOUR friends? yes yes! with GRACIE!!
Does he sing? he's not the singing-kind-of-guy but he sings occasionally when he's with me!
Does he snore? sadly YES..like a truck! *oopsie*
Do you like his friends? yes, they're an awesome bunch! =)

I love you for who you are, and for who you're NOT™!
Love you sweetie xoxo

yummy!

2010-05-22T04:09:00.006+08:00

Awesome much..?!

Check out the latest poster released..

FYI, the last poster is Riley. He looks unfamiliar to me at first.

*courtesy of Screen Rant

p/s: do check out the trailers as well!!

its been quite a while now..

2010-05-22T00:53:00.008+08:00

Inspiration: Michle

LAYER 1: ON THE OUTSIDE.
Name: Elaine Kong
Birth Date: 27-awesome March-1988
Current Location: Singapore?
Hair Color: Black the Original
Righty/Lefty: wanted to be a lefty, but sadly a righty.. =(

LAYER 2: ON THE INSIDE.
Your fear: Being alone!

LAYER 3: YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW.
Your thoughts first waking up: Em, what's my day like?
Your best physical feature: *thinks* DO I..?!
Your bed time: Insomnia ruins everything nowadays!
Your most missed memory: Time spent with Grandma!

LAYER 4: YOUR PICK.
Pepsi or Coke: Neither!
McDonald’s or Burger King: Popeye's?
Single or Group Dates: Either!
Adidas or Nike: Nike.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla..yum~
Cappuccino or Coffee: Frap?!

LAYER 5: DO YOU.
Smoke: Never do, never will!
Cuss: HUH?! sounds familiar..
Take showers: Duh~
Have a crush: Who doesnt? So, YES! But not at the moment! =)
Like school: I miss the people in school.
Believe in yourself: Contradicts myself too much sometimes.
Believe what goes around comes around: Yes yes! Karma!
Believe everything happens for a reason: Of course!
Think you’re a health freak: I guess I should be eh?!

LAYER 6: IN THE PAST MONTH.
Gone to the mall: YES
Been on stage: No.
Eaten sushi: YES YES!!
Been hurt: sadly yes. =(
Dyed your hair: NEVER! but always tempted..haha..

LAYER 7: HAVE YOU EVER.
Played a stripping game: no
Kissed the same sex: guess not..?
Gotten beaten up: no
Changed who you were to fit in: nope!

LAYER 8: GETTING OLD.
Age you’re hoping to be married by: late 20s..? *hint hint*
Number of kids you’re planning on having: 2 or 3 possibly..?

LAYER 9: IN A GIRL/GUY.
Best eye color: natural would do. =)
Hair color: either blonde, black or red, I would still love him as he is!
Short or long hair: Short!
Fat or fit: Fit?
Looks or personality: Personality rocks! woohoo~
Fun or serious: Fun AND serious!

LAYER 10: WHAT WERE YOU DOING.
1 MINUTE AGO: Switched white apple on.
1 HOUR AGO: Train-ing back home
1 WEEK AGO: *thinks* stayed home?
1 YEAR AGO: HUH?!!

LAYER 11: FINISH THE SENTENCE.
I FEEL: tired and ready to hit the sack but cant!
I HATE: people who walk and smoke at the same time!! GOSH!
I HIDE: my feelings.
I NEED: a job! =S
I LOVE: every moment spent with you sweetie! =D

it gets the better of me..

2010-05-15T04:31:00.005+08:00

Inspiration: Michle's

Its been a few days since the eagerness to blog has been taken away by the big P. Just so you know, its that infamous word that everyone tends to have in them but yet, not realizing.

PROCRASTINATION!!

Yup! There goes your BIG P.

Im about to say that I've got not much to blog about actually, and coming to think of it, I might have over-used that particular phrase a lil too much now huh? Abusing it in a way! Haha.

Well, there's some good news to share here though.

First of all, OFFICIALLY announcing that moi (yours truly), is proud to call myself a graduate from University of ~~London~~ Sunderland, with a Second Upper Class Honours Degree! Yes, Im damn proud of it, given that its not First Class anyway! So, yea! Go ruin other people's moments! Shoo! You can stop reading here onwards!

The week before the actual collection of the certificate was really nerve wrecking given the chances of failing again! BUT, luckily and thank God, it turned out pretty okay! *dances* =D Im thankful in the name of Jesus especially, boyfriend, bestie, friends, family and lecturers who gave and show support throughout the entire 11 months. Never would've come this far without the endless amount of support regardless in terms of monetary and morally. Here's my gratitude of my gratefulness towards your supportive actions! Thank you so so much! Huggles~

Another chapter close, and yet another awaits. Study days are long gone and its to embark on a new chapter to the working world now. *shudders* Pray hope in getting good news to attend interviews and ALSO securing it! Yes yes, please please please! I am that desperate now!

Besides all that, Im just happy to share the moment of happiness with you sweetie! =) Nevertheless, you and your crude sense of humor kills it all! BUT I still love you for who you are and also for who you're NOT!! Huggles~ xoxo

of rojak and beyond!

2010-05-05T00:10:00.004+08:00

My first May post on the fifth! =)

Lazy to blog nowadays, no inspirations. Plus, there's nothing to blog about or Im finding that there isnt anything interesting enough to talk about. Hence, the temporarily abandonment. And also the title says it all. Will blog what comes to mind!

First, the finally awaited family trip comes and go within 13 days! On top of that, Im practically cut out from the social networking for 2 weeks!! Oh wait! Assuming that there's cell connection BUT it was one hell of a rollercoaster experienece for me! Urgh~ How I miss communication! Even staring at my phone doesnt help much! Not at all! It makes me so edgy and uninterested the entire trip! But at least it was some trip! Plus, who gets sick on a trip like that and also PMS! Yeah, one hell of a trip that is!

After that, reality sinks in. Forcing me on a job hunt! And everything else about what's life going to be for me. Blah blah blah.. Come what may that is. Been recuperating for a week now after the trip. Health has taken a toll on me. During a foot massage, it seems that I've got lungs problem and also insomnia. That's according to those Chinese foot diagram where it shows whichever part that you felt pain during the massage indicates different place of your body which needs medical attention, or at least. For a girl my age, Im having poor health! But it still doesnt beat me walking while it snows heavily! Bah! =D

Nothing beats the moment of meeting up with the handsome boy! Yes, he's handsome enough for me! =) It pains much to be without each other. He amuse me much and yet we cant get enough of each other, or is it only me sweetie? Regardless, Im just on cloud nine! Yay! *dances*

p/s: em, not sure what to p/s about! hee..
p.p/s: my left upper jaw hurts like a b*tch! wisdom tooth!! =S

the jealous pot

2010-04-11T05:11:00.004+08:00

Inspiration: Artists for Haiti - We Are the World

Recent events relating to couples and friends in which leads me to stumble across pictures and much more.Perhaps it was nothing, or blame it on the social networking sites that reveals most of every individuals ongoing activities accordingly. It makes me wonder nevertheless. You may stop reading from this point onwards as the matters pushed further based solely on my point of view.

Living in a state of denial doesnt help much as they were so good together BEFORE. It was such a pity that I really feel for her here knowing another existed into the present. But, what's that gotta do with me, right? Nah ah. Told you that Im just merely expressing on how things looked to me. Yes, you may call me a busy body but HEY! Dont judge me yet. Not poking into other people's business absolutely! Let's take it as just a phase. And accept the fact somewhere that they both HAD already moved on going on with their own individual life and as long as they're happy, Im fine with it. =) You have my blessings.

Well, it doesnt end there either. Nor is it related but mostly pertaining to another two individuals. It was an ending story but for how long already? Im assuming 2 years? Hmm. Things happen for a reason and I must say, its bound to happen but at the same time, I was happy for them (in denial again) although much has been said about her character. No guy could tolerate such behaviour, and it beats me that its still water running deep. But hey, its NOT for me to know but THEM. So, perhaps its a blessing in disguise?

As for me, purely enjoying every moment together as I do believe there's US in near future, but Im no psychic nor a fortune teller. Let's hope that its not the case of denial here and its for REAL! *beams* Love you sweetie.

Eat Pray Love

really something, isnt it?

2010-04-09T03:29:00.005+08:00

Inspiration: Michle Kougra!

A - Available: Happily, NO!
B - Best Friend: who else? Gracie!!
D - Dream: em, lots of it..*thinks* the last was the boyfriend cutting parts of my side fringe off! =X
E - Easiest Person To Talk To: easy-Gracie!!
F - Favorite Food: practically not picky, just no onions, bitter gourd, brinjal, mayonnaise, artificial strawberries..oh wait..its favourite right?
G - Gummy Bears Or Worms: GUMMY BEARS!!
H - Hometown: Malaysia
I - Instrument: the electone! rusty now..
J - Job: *shudders* it gives me nightmare! currently unemployed.
K - Kids: oh i ADORE kids! =)
L - Longest Car Ride: does coach counts?!
M - Milk Flavor: huh?! like milkshake or what?
N - Number Of Siblings: a brother!
O - One Wish: time freeze!
P - Phobias: hmm..claustrophobia..fear of being confined in!
Q - Favorite Quote: do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will take care of itself. Matthew6:34
R - Reason To Smile: the bright early mornings, miss marc, sweet nothings, Gracie, cupcakes, fun times, get togethers, popeye's, and most importantly the boyfriend!
S - Song You Last Heard: Purest of Pain - Son by Four
T - Time You Woke Up: 2.55pm
U - Unknown Fact About Me: loves being cuddled to sleep.
V - Vegetable: basically all greens, except for those 3 mentioned above.
W - Worst Habits: quite often forgetting 1 thing everytime she travels.
X - X-Rays You’ve Had: chest
Y - Your Favorite Pastime: stay in bed and watch movie! yay~
Z - Zodiac Sign: fiesty Aries!

People to invite to your dream dinner party, dead or alive:

Natasha Richardson
Princess Diana
Marc Jacobs
Paul Scholes
Heidi Klum

Bands/musicians I’ve been listening to a lot lately

Chery Cole
Timbaland
Alicia Keys
Owl City
Black Eyed Peas

p/s: oh wait! what happened to 'C'?!

what shall it be?

2010-04-01T02:50:00.004+08:00

Well, well. Here goes yet another entry.

Oh wait. I forgot. Inspiration: Livejounal!

It has been nearly a couple of days since my second visit to the city of Merlion. It was a mesmerizing weekend! Obviously. How can it not be awesome right? Afterall, it was a special day on a special month with that special someone. Best part was to celebrate with the world! Yup, Earth Hour was coincidentally on my day! So its even better! Right. Before I keep saying how awesome my day is, it didn't help much with much pessimism a week before it all took place. A lil skeptical, worried, anguish and nonchalant has wiped out the anticipation in looking forward for an awesome day even though, yes, its a day to celebrate. I dont turn Double.2 every year now, do I? Nevertheless, the anticipated call was never made and I was totally swept off the moment I step into his room! Needless to say, I was taken by surprise with the lil gesture where its the thought that counts. Everything else is secondary. Thank you sweetie! =)

To add to it, sadly, I have to say that this trip will be the last (for now!) given that after the trip to East, it will take a while to be back here once again. Its undecided on when or even what's going to be next. So, Im savouring the moments as these are hard to come by; once my leaving takes place for a solid month or two. True enough, we're never apart as it doesnt exist between us but sometimes, reality is cruelty. As Shah would say: Prepare for the worst, hope for the best!
So yea, Im doing my very best and mind you, it takes two to tango!

While the man's busy at work, I've kept myself company with Eclipse. Once again, I find solace within it given that it's the second time reading. It never tires me out reading it all over again as how Edward was ever so protective of Bella, and at the same time, compromising with her every needs as to see her happy as she's all that he has of her. Just done reading it and on with Breaking Dawn! =)

Earlier on, I've came across this post by Michelle. Somehow, she loves to write about her working time with Louis and it always entertain me much! As much as I dislike his crude sense of humor, but its also what I loved about him. He just shows it in a different way between us. Nonetheless, I still love him for who he is! Oh yes, before getting carried away, the joke!

Forgot how it started in the first place, but it all begins with Michelle indefinitely. As she's Indian, Shah's been giving her names and such, which resulted among one of them that includes Blackie. Did I mentioned she was Indian? Yup, so due to the skin coloured, it rub off immediately with Louis and the rest. My guess would be it was unintentional but it's fun making fun of others especially with Michelle. She's such a magnet for such fun. Anyway, it involves a Green Banana this time. So, she was to buy bananas on her way to work. Usually, we picked greenish -yellow bananas as in not too ripe and not over ripe! Just nice! The minute Louis saw those bananas, the racist joke started. Somehow, anything related to Michelle is bound to be racist. He commented on those bananas being too green and it was not even Hari Raya! See! Still LMAO as Im relishing what I've read. It was surreal like I was there while the conversation took place. Just that it would be so much fun if I DID actually. Michelle was totally taken aback that it didnt crossed her mind that even GREEN BANANAS are subjected to racist remarks in my assumption. Not long after during that day, somehow the bananas turn yellow and being Michelle, she couldn't just not savour her moment of triumphant and had to prove to Louis that he was wrong. Not a good choice I presume as Louis interjected her by saying its because Hari Raya was only for a day!
Here's goes the conversation.

the very shocking joke from louis

supposed to do this a long time ago. this happened 2 Fridays ago when i was working morning with him. If i am not wrong. F.Y.I it's just a joke.
I bought a banana from cold storage and it was uber green because the current one we have is really like a leopard. So this was what he said:

Louis: Such a green banana? It's not Hari Raya you know
Michelle: *looks shocked. WHATTT? I didn't know you were THAT rasict
Louis: I am not targeting you for once.
Later in the day when i was about to go for break it turned yellow. the really bright one and i told him.
Michelle: See! Luckily i bought a green one because it is so ripe now!
Louis: you want to know why?
Michelle: why?
Louis: because Hari Raya is for a day only.

Hahahahahahahaha! This is hilarious to me as I remembered that one time during our shifts which involves the three of us (while I was still a traineed then) about a milk cloth incident. Well, technically it was Michelle and Louis as I was just an audience and yet I couldn't help laughing out loud! Due to memory lapse, I dont quite recall those details of the whole scenario but it's funny alright! He's my Mr Funnyman now! =)

p/s: Happy April Fool's day..!

68% innocent? really..?

2010-03-29T16:16:00.003+08:00

Interesting! Posted by Michle Kougra..

Start with 100% and subtract 1% for everything that you’ve done. Then re-post as your __% innocent.

01. Smoked
02. Drank alcohol
03. Cried when someone died.
04. Been drunk.
05. Had sex.
06. Been to a concert.
07. Gotten/given a hand job.
08. Been verbally/sexually harassed.
09. Verbally/sexually harassed somebody.
11. Felt someone up and/or been felt up.
12. Laughed so hard something came out of your nose .
13. Cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend before.
14. Been cheated on by a boyfriend/girlfriend.
15. Been to prom.
16. Cried at school.
17. Gotten lost in a Wal-Mart or a department store.
18. Went streaking.
19. Given or received a lap dance.
20. Had someone of the opposite sex in your room.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 90%

21. Had someone of the opposite sex sleep over.
22. Slept over at someone of the opposite sex’s house.
23. Kissed a stranger.
24. Hugged a stranger.
25. Went scuba diving.
26. Driven a car.
27. Gotten an x-ray.
28. Hit by a car.
29. Had a party.
30. Done drugs.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 85%

31. Played strip poker/darts/pool.
32. Got paid to strip for someone.
33. Run away from home.
34. Broken a bone.
35. Eaten sushi.
36. Bought porn.
37. Watched porn.
38. Made porn.
39. made beans.
40. Been in love.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 82%

41. French kissed.
42. Laughed so hard you cried.
43. Cried yourself to sleep.
44. Laughed yourself to sleep.
45. Stabbed yourself.
46. Shot a gun.
47. Trash talked someone and then acted like their best friend the next day.
48. Been online for 9 consecutive hours.
49. Watched TV for 9 consecutive hours.
50. Watched an animal die.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 79% (9 hours of tv?)

51. Watched a person die.
52. Kissed somewhere with at least 1 person present.
53. Pranked somebody.
54. Put somebody in the hospital.
55. Snuck into someone’s room and/or your own room after being out.
56. made spicy beans.
57. Dressed punk.
58. Dressed Goth.
59. Dressed preppy .
60. Been to a motocross race.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 78%

61. Avoided somebody.
62. Been stalked.
63. Stalked someone.
64. Met a celebrity.
65. Played an instrument.
66. Ridden a horse.
67. Cut yourself.
68. Bungee jumped.
69. Ding dong ditched somebody.
70. Been to a wild party.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 74%

71. Been caught stealing something.
72. Kicked/punched a guy in the balls.
73. Stolen a boyfriend/girlfriend from a friend.
74. Gone out with your friend’s crush .
75. Got arrested.
76. Been pregnant.
77. Babysat.
78. Been to another country.
79. Started your house on fire.
80. Had an encounter with a ghost.

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 73% (boring eh?)

81. Donated your hair to cancer patients.
82. Been asked out by someone that you never thought you’d be asked out by.
83. Cried over a member of the opposite sex.
84. Had a boyfriend/girlfriend for over 2 months.
85. Sat on your butt all day.
86. Ate a whole carton of ice cream all by yourself.
87. Had a job.
88. Gotten cut from a sports team.
89. Been called a whore.
90. Danced like a whore .

PERCENTAGE SO FAR: 69%

91. Been mistaken for a celebrity.
92. Been in a car accident.
93. Been told you have beautiful eyes.
94. Been told you have beautiful hair.
95. Raped somebody.
96. Danced in the rain.
97. Been rejected.
98. Left a restaurant without paying.
99. Punched someone/slapped someone in the face.
100. Been raped.

PERCENTAGE: 68%

somewhere i belong

2010-03-20T03:17:00.006+08:00

One thing leads to another and it chalks up and there! It hit me hard and right on.

Even during secondary days, where my inner self has been fragile enough as Im only tough on the outside sends wrong signal to most people. That includes family especially. Growing up in my teens has lead to wonders of my feelings being ignored. More to say that my independence 'deceived' them in believing that I can fend for myself. Not true! Support is most essential with care and showing of love that's supposed to be vital in the upbringing of a teenage daughter in my case. Sadly, there wasnt any, or perhaps they have the weirdest way in showing it. Nevermind I said before... As she's all that matters to me. She was more than just your ordinary grandma. My confidante. My best friend at home. My 'mother'. She was all that I had until one day, she left. And again, I was left to fend for myself.

Until now, I still need that lil support, a tad bit of care and love regardless towards someone you call as a daughter, sister, friend and all that I could be. Do I really need to beg for it? Seriously? Is it that too much to ask for? I wonder sometimes. And right that moment. It hit me there and then.

The past is all that builds the future but I dislike what's of the present. Specifically, I loathe it. On top of that, Im torn between two places. And it got me thinking sometimes, what's there to live for? What's the purpose on the other side? I tried convincing myself endlessly as to what's the motivator? Why should I choose there instead of here? I was once SO convinced that I've found where I belong. But my place is here. In which Im from. The place I call home. Like I said before, going back makes me feel indifferent. Its so unfamiliar to me all over. Like a stranger. Like I dont belong. On the contrary, being home is another thing. As I've already had my heart stolen. Knowing that I DO belong there. However, to exist in the presence of home is like the existence of just another piece of furniture. Its just a place where we all co-habitat. That's all. And pondering whether my existence means anything at all? It's back to basic all over again. Hence, where do I belong..?

Perhaps, Im too pessimist about how my life should be. Or maybe Im stuck home too long? Or rather, its the communication? The last thing on my mind is that my presence is the burden of others. Therefore, guiltiness reeks in together with the mindset of a crazy delusional. Pathetic right?

Every human being's life is a cylce. Study, work, get married, have a family, raise your kids, pay your bills, providing for the family, make sure your kids turns out well, retire, and lastly grow old together. I wonder how's my life going to be! Well, I want to be all of the above. This is how I picture my life to be at least.

Get a good job, save up, go on holidays, settle down, make babies & yada yada. Oh you know how it is. Sometimes, its just bad timing! Everything's too realistic! Anyhow, the first is to be financially secured! That's the most important. Yup, and I'll learn to pick my way up from there.
HOPEFULLY!

double-two

2010-03-18T23:55:00.004+08:00

This is my 90th post!
Special indeed!

A special post for a special someone!

Happy Birthday Gracie =)

Its especially for you!
A special post for a special you..

utter disappointment!

2010-03-14T04:44:00.002+08:00

It takes heaps of courage to discuss this issue with you.
Waiting to be send out of the right time.

hooray~

2010-03-11T01:17:00.007+08:00

Oh yes! I've finally accomplished 5 scraps in just merely 4 hours! Awesome much~

Pictures will be uploaded soon. Blame it on the laziness in me! Hopefully it doesnt lead to procrastination! Yup! Promise. Soon!

Current location: The city of Merlion.
Been here for the past couple of days now! Excited obviously! However, it all seems unfamiliar and indifferent even though it has been my second home now. As to what the boyfriend says, "You'll take time to familiarize yourself once again". Or something similar. Brain memory are deteriorating nowadays. Another year older in 3 weeks time now. But I do hope so that it's just those temporary feelings of an outsider merely.

On a lighter note, Kumar's Stripped Bare & Standing Up theater performance was simply magical and superb! Entertaining together with its wicked sense of humor which is utterly hilarious. He (oops!) SHE is one hell of the most renounce Singapore stand-up comedian! A big round of applause!

It was held at the grand and infamous landmark of Singapore which can be admired through a bird's eye view or better know as "the Durian". Officially it's the Esplanade. The interior was of the Victorian style-like theater where it reminds me of those plays in which Shakespeare used to perform. Totally unlike Istana Budaya! This is simply marvelous! Sadly, only pictures during the pre-show was taken as photography or recording was beyond the place. *wonders* Why didn't I take more pictures outside of the entrance! =X Will definitely watched it next year again!

p/s: pictures soon! stay tuned! =)

edit: I forgot this! how could I!! grr~

=D
A movie with sweetie! Yay~

mr fredrickson

2010-03-04T04:05:00.008+08:00

Will you watch with me again sweetie?

just different`

2010-03-03T05:19:00.002+08:00

Inspiration: Michelle Kougra's blog.

It was just any other normal post found in most blog but somehow, this one post just struck me! A statement of '...feelings cant be summarize into words..' doesn't apply in that particular post as I beg to differ otherwise. Simple and yet profound. The meanings behind those words overwhelms me just by reading! Language is never a barrier towards communication but just simply the way of expressing it in your own way and that's all that matters.

Recently, there's aplenty of blog post's I've read that sums up their individual experience during the CNY 2010; year of the Tiger. Sorry to disappoint, but I wont be doing so, as although being a Chinese (and proud to be one!), it has never been the holiday that I've always look forward to. Not since the past few years. As ironic as it seems, I treasured family bonding, outings and dinners together with the relatives but it all doesn't mean anything ever since October 2007. It's all down memory lane now. Taken away, buried underground where it belongs. Efforts and initiatives are shown but it takes two to tango. In short, it has never occured to me on reminiscing and blogging about it.

Perhaps, you're finding me bullshitting, but I'd like to think it as this way with how I see things lately. People just take things for granted until its too late!

wrong timing..

2010-03-03T05:08:00.003+08:00

Day by day
Wonders all along
Is it all that it can be?
Or there's more to hope for?

Sadly, life is too realistic
Until dreams become none
Where practicality kicks in
And it goes 'poof'!

There's many choices in life
But the only one seems best
As it all boils down to the only one
Where usually its of refusal

The world goes round happy
But a total disaster when it doesnt work out
Followed by an aftermath that huge
Where one is left to ponder intensely

Sometimes, it takes a minute to think
But a heap of courage to proceed
This is where communications lies
As action speaks louder than words!

needs excitement!

2010-03-01T04:19:00.002+08:00

Yay! It's already March! =) And it means much more than that.

So, how am I coping with life at home so far? Hmm.. Monotone? Mundane? Erm, pretty much that way. Sigh.

Sometimes, I do wonder what's the point of getting up every afternoon, wondering what should I do today and how's my day going to be like? Its been like that for the past 2 weeks I guess? Yes, I do have a choice to be in bed all day long being in Lala Land but that just not me. A day's routine pans out this way:

Early rise at around afternoon, 2.30pm max, but I did ended up waking at 3 plus some other day. That's due to insomnia lately. There's been a lot going through my mind every night when I tried to sleep or in other words, its messing with my head literally. Physically, Im supposed to be in bed due to the tiredness (will explain later!) but emotionally Im wide awake! Sometimes, time drags till 8 in the morning! Well, I could very much have an early breakfast and finally hitting the sack right? Oh well!

My only companion at home: television! It has been utmost devoting by keeping me entertain throughout the entire day of each passing hour without fail and it better not, else, I'll go completely berserk! Serious. Pretty please don't, okay? HBO, SMV, E!, MTV, [V], and yada yada are those channels that doesn't fail me every single day. Not once. Bad thing about it, too much repeats, especially HBO and SMV. I've watched practically FOUR times of The Mummy Returns in 2 weeks!! Madagascar 2, thrice. Two times of House Bunny twice and so much more. Luckily, there's series of other dramas daily which Im quite familiar with the timing already. Much love, Honour and Passion! =D I heart that Singaporean drama ever since the first time; couple of years back. It brings back memories. So to speak, Im a couch potato officially. Kid you not, even by watching in front of the tv all day tires me out even though I did NOTHING!
Then there's dinner, back to tv again after that. Later night, I'll retreat back to my room, surfing the internet for a while and its back to square one all over. Tiredness, insomnia. Yup, that explains it all.
Besides that, I DO actually do house chores but it's to a minimum level due to the lifestyle of how things are at home. But at least something!

What? I should like go out more right? But I just don't feel like sometimes. Not that Im whining or anything but it's TOO routine and monotonous. Don't get me wrong. Its just the company, not the issue of just getting out of the house. Besides, Im picky! Or in other ways, they're either occupied with their daily activities of either studies or working. So, yea, it's like a retreat to me now at home. Nevertheless, I still do try to incorporate different patterns of activities everyday regardless of how exact same thing Im doing everyday. It would be better if I've got my reading material. Just that recently, I've finished the Shopaholic series and don't intend to re-read again. Well, I missed my books. Those which I left over there.

On a lighter note, a so-called short trip back to Merlion city next week. One week! Wee~
But, I obviously have my worries as well. Hmm.. =\

Oh oh, did I mention that Im actually watching the performance of Mr Kumar, a popular stand-out comedian in Singapore? He's hilarious! Totally. And like finally after so long of wanting to watch him live rather than on YouTube!. It's worth it.

Cant wait for the weekends! =)

p/s: perhaps baking? but what to bake and who will savour it? =\

a brand new start..

2010-02-21T04:41:00.002+08:00

Just went I was about to hit the sack, a sense of obligation took over and here I am, writing this post. In fact, *yawns* its pretty much my bed time already. But, oh well. Im inspired by Manchester United vs Everton this time from Michkaa's blog.

Just so you know, currently Im taking a short break after much of continuous studies since high school. At the same time, it's also an opportunity for me to actually think through what, where and how Im supposed to deal with yet another journey of my life after graduating. And yet, I leave for home with a heavy heart. When one feeling is suppressed, it tends to lead to a much worse break down there after, putting up a brave front altogether. I must admit, that Im only tough on the outside but fragile on the inside. Nevertheless, faith is all I have in us and hopeful at the same time. That's what keeps me going till today and many more days to come. Just cant wait to be together for good once and for all.

Coming back home brings back a sense of familiarity but my heart has already been taken away by the one and only person. Yes. It's you sweetie. =) Thankfully, there's the company of Gracie during the Chinese New Year period, not forgetting families and relatives. But I still yearn for your company. Badly! Everything reminds me of you. And tonight, it is Man Utd that triggers all sweet and loving memories between us. One thing leads to another, with Teamtalk Football.com to Eztv.it. Those were just sweet nothings but among of those that I missed most.

Oops. Im being too mushy am I? =| But I do miss you sweetie. Not a day goes by without a single reminder which ends up missing you more. Huggles~

of boys & girls..

2010-01-26T01:08:00.003+08:00

What happens when boys like girls or vice versa? They fall in love right? Only if its that SIMPLE. But heck, life's always COMPLICATED. Been wanting to share this for quite a while, but as usual, I obviously need motivators/reasons (good ones) to start. Just that recently, there's just lots of speculating relationships (inclusive of break-ups) and yada yada. You might wonder what is it to me, well, I can HONESTLY tell you that Im just NOT being nosy, just SHARING!

Was on the phone earlier with Gracie, talking about boy, girl relationship, mostly. Very random and sudden. Haha. But what I'm sharing here are of those complicated relationship. Em, well, not in a relationship to begin with. Well, this is my point of view, so keep your own opinions to yourself, alright? No names shall be mentioned in order to protect the privacy of various individuals. Sounded like a love guru? Nah! Im still learning even in my very own one.

Scenario #1.
Boy A in a few years relationship with this girl. However, he started getting intimate (a lil bit of flirting perhaps?) with a friend, Girl A, of his. And somehow, his mixed signals has been driving Girl A a lil confuse about the situation. After all, he's attached, isnt he? So, why is he doing such things? Besides, Girl A has a bad history of liking a guy previously who's ALSO in a relationship. And best of all, Boy A knows about her history but subconsciously inflicting this to Girl A over again? Being the confidante of Girl A, it was a hell of a time for her to get over of the previous 'so-called' relationship, so obviously, does not want to see karma repeating itself! Girl A does not see it is necessary to open up to Boy A of his doings to her in such manner but just going with the flow which is just messing up with her head of why is this happening?!

Scenario #2
Girl B likes, or maybe had a crush on Boy B who's a dancer. A famous one among his peers especially. Given his looks and all (according to Girl B), it is to die for; given the talent in dancing and a more average looking type of guy to me as compared that Girl B is mad over heels for Boy B. The issue is that Boy B is aware of her crush towards him, but at the same time going with the flow. Girl B will constantly be Facebook-ing on his profile, checking messages posted on his profile from his various fans (girls mostly) going ga-ga over him and to an extent that SOME are in such delusional state that he's the boyfriend! Well, this is what you get when you're famous? All sorts of people will want to own you in such way, praying and hoping or maybe even ASSUMING you're already his/hers! Girl B is partly in denial as subconciously thinking that he's the boyfriend even though she isnt those obsessive type as in normal daily life, she's perfectly clear that they're not together but mainly just friends, however, at the same time harbouring her feelings towards him. In short, she finds that their friends but actions speaks louder than words as it says otherwise of that a girlfriend should be doing for a boyfriend. Constant sms-ing and calls every other day to Boy B leaves me thinking that she's probably doing too much. And in such way, she may not be seeing results out of it, if this prolongs BUT she's happy in doing so. As a good friend, at times, I just kept to myself, knowing for a fact that she's pining for interactions of Boy B in which she knows, well, perfectly clear of what she's up to.

Scenario #3
Girl C is happily in her current relationship. At the same time, she's aware of the love of from Boy C. Yet, she treated Boy C AS IF she's a true boyfriend, at times asking him to run errands for her and stuffs. SADLY, Boy C is WILLING to be bossed around by her in return of his love for her. BUT in turn both Boy C and Girl C are aware of the 'actual' situation where she loves her boyfriend but at the same time, is willing to accept the attention, love and care from Boy C. From the account of Boy C, he knows that its a foolish act to be around for her whenever she needed him but can't help feeling that way for her as Boy C has never love someone so deeply, compared to his previous ex-es. Also, it was also undeniable that Boy C is willing to wait for Girl C's in return for her love and such, in which for the period of time, it might not be happening at all. So, where's the point of this? Short to say, Boy C is happy even it is not how it should be.

The irony of the three scenarios are that although no confirmation of relationships, but yet they're happy in their own ways.

At the same time, there are also couples who has been together for years (3-5), but it ended! Yes, sad I know. But every other relationship has their own storyline behind those breakings and outsiders does not have the right to be judgemental or even understand! If its meant to be, then it is; if its not, so be it! Quote from a friend, "It's better to be with no one than to be with the wrong one!'. SO TRUE. Obviously, these individuals has made their own desicions and I do wish them happiness. My blessings goes to them. =)

Its easy just to fall in love but proves to be more than that when you're in one. Going through obstacles of ups and downs in the relationship and obviously making the best out of it. Let's just say, it's definitely challenging to maintain one and to truly love someone who you see a future in. Shouldn't it be in happy endings where couple exchange vows, starting a family and to grow old with together? Eventually, it's just all or nothing right? But I still believe its all up to individuals whether or not they're putting in effort to really make the best out of their relationship and the saying goes, it will definitely pays off in the ends!

Cheers!

p/s: All above are not of fictional characters but are true in many ways! Forgive me if I MAY have exaggerated the stories conveyed through BUT its all based solely on my POINT OF VIEW and you may disagree with what I might have added in.

months ago..

2010-01-24T04:08:00.004+08:00

Notice the difference? Hmm.. Temporary layout for the time being. Instead of the usual 3 columns, its now 2 columns instead. Nevermind then. I shall try to get myself usedto it to this TEMPORARILY as its still way beyond comparison to the previous one. The header's font is too boring, so perhaps I'm going to fix that once I got hold of the idea of creating a web page! Need help. Desperate to customize it. Seriously! You know who you are!

Since the layout's done, Im gonna start blogging bout the past two months events? Hmm.. *thinks* There's quite a number of events I guessed? But it wont be in individual posts, just summarizing it in lists form perhaps? Of course with dates I hope? Quite tasking, but I'll keep to my promise obviously!

Can't remember when's what so here goes:

2009 ended with Gracie and her sister over at Singapore Flyer with spectacular fireworks right from the capsule, overlooking Marina Bay (think so!) for the exact 10 minutes at the peak (nearly!) and it was AWESOME! Sadly, the recording of the fireworks died at the last minute of the finale and I MISSED THAT PART! =S Somehow, its always imperfect for me in life for nearly everything! Oh well~
Stayed the entire night till the very morning of New Year's with the girls after work at CQ. It was such good times. I missed that. Although it has been nearly a year now that I left, many things has changed and I really reminisce those good old days. HOW I WISHED things doesnt change. After all, it will NEVER be the same anymore although the thoughts of returning is tempting. Sadly, certain Goodbyes are permanent!
How about Christmas? Hmm.. I shall skip that part. Sorry.

For twenty-ten,

Finally completed my course of studies. Undecided. Unemployed. BUT to take a short break till the time's right to finally step into the working world? God! I feel old and so adult now. Sigh.
Somehow, I feel that it's back to basic again! This time last year, I left for home and it was not until May of 2009 where Im close to love again. With the long distance and all, it was just so difficult for the both of us. Im not too sure whether I'll have the courage to go through this all over again. It just pains the both of us! But I know we shall managed like those times, right.
Had Ayam Penyet for dinner after the last paper! It was awesome. Shall bring love there sometimes!
Had the best four days! Right after the 15th, though it was just simple dinners, movie and monopoly deal, but I was happy enough just to be waking up to you every other morning and to end my day with you by my side. How I wished that those happy times didn't have to end so quickly but as they say, 'happy times passes by quickly'. =(
Leaving again on the 10th Feb and not knowing how long does this 'short' break will ever take. Meanwhile, my life has always been a rollercoaster road, still ongoing, not knowing when it'll ever stop. Im just looking forward to those days where sweetie's coming over to visit even just for a few days. It'll always be a heartbreaking moment when we have to say our goodbyes. Why does it have to be this way? Sigh. I just wish there's always another option but it will always be the least favourable options that I had to make choice of .You will visit, right? *hopeful*

Even with happy moments, there's always sad and unavoidable times where we do have our own arguments. I mean which couple doesn't right? Regardless, its the outcomes that matters and I believe this has brought us closer at times but with the recent situation, it's all so familiar to me again. Im not complaining, but just hoping of having more communication between us. Proper conversation. Hard isnt it with all the busy schedule? Hmm.. Nevertheless, the love fool's always hopeful. Sometimes, I do doubt myself whether am I doing more harm than good? I missed those old time when we just started; how you were always being so attentive and caring, of all those sweet nothings. Yet, I do understand the responsibilities that comes right when work has taken over. Everything's so short and simple nowadays. Perhaps it all boils down to the repeating of familiarity, isnt it?

Guess it got out of hands while writing as it ends with such an emo passage! =S But that's all for now?

p/s: Second Agnes B condom from Michelle! =)

CONGRATULATIONS & CELEBRATIONS =)

2010-01-24T02:54:00.003+08:00

Congrats to Mama Ellie!!

A very good friend of mine just enter motherhood with her bundle of joy on the 23rd of January!
Im just so happy and thrilled for her in welcoming the sweet, cute little girl of here.
Hello baby Joelle.
=)

my first for twenty-ten

2010-01-17T16:58:00.002+08:00

In case you didn't noticed, the template of my blog went "POOF!".
Sigh. Not AGAIN!! If Im not mistaken, the link's already broken, and trying my best to source for yet another layout all over again!
Not easy anyway to get a suitable layout that I totally dig it in for. And now I really missed the previous one. Nothing beats that! It's the most awesome layout that I've ever had and hope to see it still working after it has been rectified. Oh by the way, it's from Blogger Buster. Amanda is truly an amazing and creative in designing all the templates! =) Thanks!

Before the layout thingy is resolved, I shall not be blogging for a while now till I've fixed it!
So, you've gotta wait a while more then.
Stay tune!

what shall it be?

2009-12-29T23:23:00.002+08:00

Another update (perhaps last) for this year.

Is it me or is it just like every other year?
Everyone's either, blogging, tweeting, FB-ing about the few more days left to 2010. Hmm. Perhaps its just only me. Im the only one not feeling the mood about New Year but it has been like this every year. Nothing to look forward to and DEFINITELY nothing to celebrate about (exception:2000). So yeah, Im just different! =)

Pretty much this holiday season is a bit mundane. With assignments and finals, I still just cant let myself to enjoy. Not just YET! Soon. Mark my words.

Dont believe in making any resolutions cause its not going to be fulfill nor motivate me to achieve. I live by the days with plannings of course.

So, let's see. What shall this blogpost's talk about?

Recently watched Sherlock Holmes! I must say its pretty awesome of a work by Guy Ritchie but not as exciting as it should have been in the series. Well, it's entirely different and DEFINITELY not based by the books anyway, but still pretty interesting.
Watched Avatar too despite that the trailer gave me a bad impression not to watch it. No offence, but Im just not that type who watched sci-fi and of all, human-alike species are blue. Reminds me of Mystique from X-Men though. Nevertheless, still a good movie but pretty much overrated by those who had watched claiming it to be the 'it' movie of 2009. But wait, isnt it 2012? Well, go figure?
Hmm. What else?
Pretty much nothing fun and exciting that I've done lately. Just spending time with Mr. Assignments and the beloved White Apple.
Oh yeah, there is another. Got myself stucked in the middle of Orchard with no knowledge what-so-ever that the 'human' traffic is THAT BAD on Christmas Eve. I vouched NEVER ever to be out on that very day EVER! Why I was there you ask in the first place? Was on my way to the nearest bus stop after dinner and BAM! It was out of nowhere and I definitely see no reason to be stucked there! Sigh.

Em, I guess that sums up everything. Will update in the next post if I left out any. =)

Happy New Year people*

i cant wait!

2009-12-16T20:18:00.002+08:00

CHRISTMAS SHOPPING!

With the constraint budget and all, it wont stop me from getting gifts. Afterall, its the season of giving where everything is magical. Its CHRISTMAS for Christ's sake! Time for a lil celebration. =) Don't you agree?

Okay, back to Christmas shopping. Don't have a long list but only two! T.W.O with hell lots of cracking heads just to figure out what to get for one another.

First up is the boyfriend. Though he knows what he'll be getting but I wasnt satisfied with the actual gift. It's just not right somehow, like something's missing to make it even more special but what it is? Hmm.. Last year it was just my luck to get him Grand Manier and let's just say I don't repear gifts or at least something similar?
Who else other than this lovely bestie of mine right? Its that TIME of the YEAR again where we go gaga over Christmas-like stuffs (our favourite: Starbucks) that would make a perfect gift for one another. We would then discuss among ourselves for what seems like ages trying to get the right one. Just this year, both of us doesnt find anything likeable from Starbucks merchandise. Pretty sad. We went over details and stuffs and it was just so difficult this year! Damn. Fret not, hopefully I'll be able to get what she wants.

Happy Christmas shopping ya. =)
p/s: last minute shopping for me!

nothing much about..

2009-12-15T18:10:00.002+08:00

*announce* I OFFICIALLY HATE DECEMBER!

Okay. Except the beginning of the month where my spirits are entirely lifted due to Christmas. But then reality hits and everything starts to SINK. REAL DEEP.

Sigh. I know its always such a boring starting line everytime I post for the recent posts. Yes yes, this post wont be all that sappy and stuffs! ABSOLUTELY NOT!!

Went home sweet home during the weekends. Most porbably I would try to make it back home every two weeks now. It feels AWESOME to be home with Mum & Dad and my annonying brother but it's all good. It never feels better than to own a home and just do nothing; lazing on the couch, read a book, Mum cooked and everything is well-taken care of and I do mean EVERYTHING. Total bliss. =) Speaking of which, IM MISSING HOME ALREADY!
Had an awesome stay-over at Gracie's. Pretty much a disaster with the car problem thingy and the deprivation of our beauty sleep (practically looked like a zombie) but it was a well night spent with one another. Had lots of crap as usual, you know us girls, till the sun comes up. Haha. We woke up pretty early and managed to have breakfast. That was practically about it. She was too caught up with her assigment and without her it's TOTAL BORING to do anything else, so instead I stayed home which is good.
Deadline for one of the assignments was extended till January's 14 2010! At least not much of a rush but there's FYP and perhaps a Christmas dinner since Mum & probably Gracie coming over too.
Holiday plans - So far confirmed on Chengdu, China (13th April 2010), still in consideration includes Taiwan in May 2010, and perhaps Bangkok too (January 2010)?

Well, that's all for now ya. NOT going into much details on the ongoing FYP! God bless that I'll be able to finish it by this weekend! MUST MUST MUST! =)

little thoughts

2009-12-06T04:30:00.003+08:00

Ever again, the little thoughts in my head speaks more than my actual speech. Really frustrating. Just when Im about to shut my eyes, 'it' would creep out and start pestering me to think about stuffs that happened lately in which I decide to shut them up in reality. Rather than to face them and let them take its own course, they just wont go away.

Eveytime when the urge to blog is there, it always present itself at a VERY wrong timing. After a while, I end up not blogging (more to ranting or maybe sharing) and keeping those thoughts to myself. Sigh. Frustating isnt it?

Slowly in time, it all tend to pile up with none of it solved. Well, it is not something which I can resolve it at once but how I wish. Hmm. Guess Im already all grown up by now. Watched Twilight for the umpteenth time now but it always makes me feel indifferent and lots to think about. Remember that I mentioned before that I've had this quite unusual syptom of mine? Well, it just did. Just cant wait to watch New Moon despite having to read all four already. It just seem more lively to watch than to actually picture it in your mind as one reads on but I still do and very much enjoy reading.

A few more weeks to go and hello 2010. Hmm. Yet another year. Really do hope that whatever than Im going through in present to be on a smooth sail. I wish I could stay tough and strong as I used to be but I end up hurting more, becoming even more fragile. Things cant always go the way I want it to be but yet I believe with the willpower, I can and will achieve it. Yes, and that's life.

Its such a random post than I no longer find it necessary to connect whatever the content is. Those who read this might not get me but it's okay. Im just glad that you do bother to read part of me here. Let's just say, Im not trying to keep it from you but its just my way of telling it or simply just the way Im behaving lately. DO try to understand and assure me that I will always have your company which definitely means a lot to me. Confidence is something that I've lost lately. Therefore, it takes time.

On a happy note, Im finally going back home after 2 months since my last trip. I just miss home. A place where I can find solace. If only Grandma's still here.

humour of the day..

2009-12-03T00:43:00.004+08:00

This came through the mail..

1. There are 3 Male and 1 Female pencils in a box.
The Female pencil got pregnant !!
Which Male pencil is responsible?
THE ONE WITHOUT THE RUBBER.

2. Woman in bed with husband's best friend, phone rings!
'YES'.. OK, BYE'.
She turns to her lover and says,
THAT'S MY HUBBY, SAYS HE'S NOW GOLFING WITH YOU.

3. Three Roosters: normal, retarded and a gay.
Normal : cock-a-doodle-dooo !!!
Retarded : doodle-cock-a-dooo !!!
Gay : any-cock-will dooo !!!

4. Three Guys were introduced to a girl.
Hi,...... I'm Peter, not a saint.
I'm Paul not a POPE.
I'm John not a Baptist...
The girl replied.. Hi.. I'm Mary, not a VIRGIN

5. Girlfriends are appetizers. Tastes good at any time.
Mistresses are Tomyams..Hot and spicy. Eaten frequently.
WIVES are Maggie. Eaten when there's nothing to eat.!!!

6. Income Tax office asked a Prostitute why she puts her occupation
as CHICKEN FARMER.
She replied: I RAISED 5,000 COCKS LAST YEAR.!!

7. Yesterday's News :- A nun jogging at Jogger' Park was raped by 4 guys.
Today's News :- Nearly 100 nuns found jogging at the park.

she's only human..

2009-12-02T09:16:00.003+08:00

Just when she thought she has what it takes, reality checks in. Can it get any worst?
At this point of time, she really wish to be swallow up and stay that way in insolation. She may have put up a brave front all this while but that's who she is. People who knows her well do understand that she's actually as fragile as an egg.

People see me for who I am but I am not who they think I am.Coming to think of it, I really am not worth for what people credit me. All this while, I do believe I'll strive through it given that Im of late entry but I'm beginning to loose that part of self-confidence. It hit rock bottom. Hard enough to leave me totally numb of an aftershock, not knowing when she will see light again.

She may seem all good on the outside but doubt that it will be the same inside. Short to say, she's a walking zombie! Well, not exactly but close. She'll live but on a daily basis with an empty shell.

p/s: thanks hun for cheering me up with your post-clubbing story. huggles~
and cissy for her comforting shoulder when I couldnt hold it any longer
last but not least, I enjoyed 'camping' sweetie =)

all in one

2009-11-29T02:30:00.003+08:00

..............
For a moment, I really have no idea how to begin this post with.
Lots of eating out within the past week, loads of pictures.
It was a really tiring & tedious task uploading previous post pictures!

So yeah, I'll probably sum up those events.
A good friend from college accepted a job over here. It was such a thrilling news to me especially. Yay! =) At least a friend-someone familiar. Im just glad that Boey's here. Well, honestly, I've never had so much of familiarity within me especially in foreign soil. Not that the boyfriend's isnt a good company but at least there's a balance to it perhaps? So, don't try to ditch me kay sweetie! *wink*

As Boey's new here, I played the role of a tour guide introducing her to Unique(ly) Singapore and not surprising, it was love at first sight for her ya. It was the same to me when I was here in the first place. Long story short, we had lots of makan outings. Pictures later ya.

And also, it's Auntie's birthday. Really nervous. So we had dinner at YumCha Garden in Serangoon Garden. Awesome. That reminds me of a long-overtime-due dim sum as promised by my dearly beloved boy. Hmm. Wondering when would that day be! =\

Oh oh. Christmas's around the corner too. It's that season again. Yay. But then what to get?
Sigh. Any hints from you hun? Sweetie? Never an easy task to get him pressie especially during Christmas. But I still do love Christmas. Huggles~

For me, its a pretty hectic schedule for me lately. Hopefully things goes my way. But of course with a strong determination and most of all motivation from myself! =) And moral support too.

a special one~

2009-11-15T13:49:00.005+08:00

Happy Birthday Sweetie!!

After all the planning for months ahead, its all worth it!
Im glad it did turn out well with minor glitches and stuffs..
But its all good~

As promised!

1st surprised!

2nd gift..

3rd gift of cuppycake!

courtesy of Little House of Dreams

Excited birthday boy..

All smiles =)

Yum~licious..

Infamous Fish & Chip~

Satisfied?

A great BIG kiss..

Friday's awaits! Yay~

Love you sweetie..

its MY season~christmas.sy! =)

2009-11-04T18:28:00.004+08:00

Oh yay..!

A month plus to go and it's Christmas again!
=)

What's not to love about it right?
Okay. My wishlist(s)!

What's Christmas without Evian right?
Haha.
Managed to google 2010 evian design and its none other than
Paul Smith for evian.
Em, had not heard of him before. =S
But nevertheless, it's still pretty.
But I much preferred 08 & 09 design!
Utterly more sophisticated.
This year its like em, the anticipation wasn't there.
Showed it to the boyfriend
and guess what?
He blame me for killing his suprise for me!
Blek! =b
Anyhow I would still google it, so yeah!
There's no surprise there cuz you know I expected that.
SO, perhaps ANOTHER surprise?
=D

it shines, thn rains~& it keeps repeating!

2009-10-30T02:29:00.004+08:00

WARNING! One of 'those' melancholy post.

As much as I was hoping, it was unevitable.
Pondered over a few entries back and realized that it's more mellow than all rosey.
I wish I could do more happiness.
But that's how it works now.

Within the next two months, guess there wont be much.
Piles of endless research, projects and exam.
Not till January. Sad? Well, too bad.
That's life.

Sometimes, you're left with no options
Or there is, but just that one doesnt want to choose?
Oh well, whatever reasons that is.
Go figure..
__________________________________________________________________
*she wish that she had a choice.
not to go through Christmas with projects, etc.
guess she's left with no choice.
but she'll figure something out.
probably home's the place.
she knows what and how it's going to be like.
which she alway ends up hearing people say "you're thinking too much!"
but she hates to be right even so.
she has nothing to hope for, just that.
simplicity works best for her but never ever comes that simple.
sigh. what else then?
no one's to blame here, but that's not how it supposed to be*

Christmassy~

2009-10-29T16:13:00.010+08:00

It's my favourite of the year again!! =)

Yay!
Im just so excited!
Ironically, it's Halloween Day tomorrow, but Christmas's the BEST!!

Starbucks's finally displaying all their christmassy stuffs and Im gaga over it!
It's too cute to resist~
Much more products this year. But I do see similarity comparing to last year.
Here goes.

courtesy of Starbucks Coffee Singapore
=)
*click on picture to enlarge*

*hint* there's mr & mrs santa bear!

Surprise!!

2009-10-28T14:10:00.002+08:00

Had no idea but she's so excited lately!
Although there's still like more than 10days.

Surprise~Surprise!

p/s: =) s.m.i.l.e.

lovely butterflies~

2009-10-22T19:50:00.011+08:00

Hitting a flu bug right now as I type.

Im supposed to be finishing up on my assignment,
but end up googling (a.k.a Miss Google).
Always distracted, but I did managed to do a lil.
It's better than NOT doing kay?!

Em, that's not what I intend to blog about (procrastinating?) as I was browsing through
Shine on Yahoo and saw this awesome tech laptop from Vivienne Tam!

OMG! She has just launched her inspire Spring 2010 line edition
in conjunction with HP!
Love it!
You know, she came up with a Red version like last season?
Awesome kay!
Totally love the design and all but Im more to practicallity.
Haha. Who am I kidding right?
Usually Im all about nice and pretty stuffs which serves no purpose of usage!
Yes yes, nuff said.

Vivienne Tam's Spring 2010 Line inspired HP Mini Netbook!

Superb right?
=)

B with a double K!

2009-10-18T16:46:00.001+08:00

October 11 till 14th.
Field trip to the Land of Smiles.

Day 1 - Flight at 630am from Changi Airport.
Reached at 750am, Thai time. One hour difference!
Loiter around Suvarnabhumi Airport for a while.
Took a cab back to The Twin Tower Hotel, Bangkok.
Freshen up, head out to Chatuchak Weekend Market.
Hell lots of people with so many stalls. Lunched first. Famished!
Sleep deprived, walking along the stalls under the scorching sun!
After a couple of hours, we decided to head back to our hotel.
Showered and laze around waiting for dinner time.
Had pizza at Lotus riding on Tuk-tuk!! Whee~
Crashed finally after staying awake for more than 24.

Day 2 - Questionnaire day.
Breakfast at the hotel. Yummy! Eggs all the way.
Head out to temples arranged at the airport yesterday.
Wat Pho & Wat Arun.
Later then, head to Siam. Craving for A&W.
Shopped again.
Went for massage (shoulder and foot) before dinner.
Awesome!
Local Thai food but there isnt the regulars. Sigh. DISAPPOINTED!
Head back to freshen up. Next: Khao San Road.
Girls night out till 3am.

Day 3 - Slept through but just in time for breakfast.
Laze around for a while before going to MBK.
More shopping this time.
Manicure & Pedicure. Lovely~
Dinner time : Tom Yum Gong (just okay!) & Phad Thai! Yum~
Took a cab back to the hotel and stayed the night. Too tired.
Enjoyed the last night the most with the rest of them.

Day 4 - Back to Singapore day.
Noon flight. We'll be coming back for more! =)
Arrival at 4pm local time.
That's all folks! My few days at Bangkok!

another sunday

2009-10-04T14:27:00.004+08:00

Time heal wounds, yet changes.
Forever doesnt stays.
Therefore nothing last.

Sense of motivation has gone for a 'vacation'.
It will take her a while to be herself again.
Oh wait.
But she wont be the same person anymore.

Lights starts to get dimmer everytime
she tried to head towards the end of the tunnel
Yet, it seems to be one hell of a journey.

It's that moment of hers again.
Wondering what, how, when and where she'll end up.
Looking back, she always know what she wants.
But lately, it has been pondered yet again.
She wish.
Well, she's one hell of a complicated girl that is.

(de) anticipate?

2009-10-03T00:10:00.018+08:00

Wake me up, when September ENDS!

*welcomes October!*
=)

Another month had just passed by with not much to remember about
(or I tend to ignore it somehow?)
Bad bad experience.
Haha.
Anyway, it's already 3rd of October and yet lots of undone task! Tsk tsk! ={

Will be away during the 2nd week of October to Bangkok (BKK). Its just a field trip.
Wonders how much do I get to enjoy myself then. Hmm.
Pray hope that this month shall be better than the previous.
I've been emotion-less lately. As if I could feel of nothing.
=| Eek!

Yet at the same time I learned that short-lived happiness sometimes make me feel contented!
I live by the day NOW with no anticapition what-so-ever or to look forward to.
Pretty bad huh? *shrugs*

Ouh ouh. I read about the Halloween Night Safari the other day. Seems interesting! But it's only on weekends where all the fun is.
Sigh.

Happy Mooncake festival peeps. =)
I dont usually have such demands, but mooncake was exceptional I guess?!
After much 'talk' about it, my boy promised me.
Woohoo~that's one of the promise(S) he did fufill! *huggles~

:: The Fullerton Chocolate Baileys in Snowskin captivates me! ::
[p.s: I missed double Frosty Baileys!]

it's all in your head!

2009-09-27T22:52:00.003+08:00

Dang!

Stop messing with the tiny-yet-already-congested brain of mine PLEASEE...!

Stop transforming me into a person whom Im NOT and loathe to become.

Stop all the nonsense!

*most important of all*

JUST STOP!

p/s: thanks hun =) I owe you lots!

its been a while now..hmm*

2009-09-12T03:19:00.004+08:00

On a movie marathon now.

Bride Wars and He's Just Not That Into You.
The latter was just too boring!
Very draggy and too much drama.
Suddenly he's with her, he's not into her, he's your husband and yada yada..
All those sorta stuff makes me stuffed!
And I cant help wondering why is that book one of my must-buy.
WEIRD!!
BUT...
Quite often, most of the book that they tried to make into a movie doesn't turn out the way it seems to be..
SO...
Hmm, I might or might NOT get that book after all.
Go figure..

Talking bout books, that reminds me!
Im officially announcing that Im
DONE
with the Twilight saga books!
FINALLY!!
BUT...
It wasnt how I expect myself to feel after finally finished reading it.
as it was not how I anticipated myself to respond after the ending.
Or maybe too much Google-ing about the storyline
BEFORE I managed to finished it kills the mood/feeling!
Im always that kind-a girl who wants to know the ending when she starts reading,
or some other thing that has an ending.
NO NO NO!
That sounds wrong!
I don't want to know how it ends for certain things.
JUST the movies and books!
Yup, guess that will do for me.

Yea, so I've got no reading materials at the moment.
Probably need to source for new books perhaps?
Im just not like my boy who stocked up his collection
when he's EVEN not done with the current ones.
=b
Just his regular habit I guess?
Don't flipped kay sweetie?! =)

Ouh ouh.
It's our 9th month-sary.
Awesome right?
It's like the period of time for having a baby!
Haha.
I always like to refer nine months to having a baby.
Wonder why?

We had Swensen's
And not forgetting my usual monthly scrapbook for him.
And its pretty amazing.
I did boast once (NOT supposed to) that Im pretty good at artsy stuffs,
but it usually seems karma to me
as I think that God would take that one thing that I know and good at (I do think so!)
and make me feel like Im good for nothing!
So please, please, please, DON'T!
=)

It's 09 September of year 2009.
Finally meet up with the supervisor for the progress of Major Project (MP)
Glad I did meet up with him, it makes me feel motivated somehow.
At least I get it done and over (not over of course!) with.
Now with questionnaires and stuffs.
You don't know how lost I've felt while writing.
Gosh!
I was so miserable to even sit down and motivate myself.
I feel so useless sometimes.
Sigh.
Get a grip girl and priority first!

And and, on that night after I was done with the meeting,
head towards town to get materials
and while on my way back, my boy called..
So, I was at outlet at that very night
merely within closing time.
Well, as usual, I did helped a bit
BUT
Always tell myself not to interfere with their work
I just don't like interfering, that's all.
Obviously I would LOVE to help them out as much as I could
as long Im not imposing on them.
And I suddenly see myself checking the bars' from top to bottom, left to right.
Back to old times eh?
Well, I just cant get rid of that normality that I was
ONCE in-charged of the bar during morning shifts.
Boy, it felt good!
Oh how much I miss being a so-called (under-qualified) barista!
=)

Then I had this massive headache on the way home
AFTER a few shots of tequila!
Damn!
Didn't know that it'll get to my head that way.
Sigh.
Guess its about time to de-stress a lil?
Sorry that you have to see me that way!
Pretty embarassed myself..
*blushed*

So in the mean time, I was thinking about next weekend.
Whether I should be going home or not!
The boyfriend's 'booked' for the whole of next week till
the next following Monday.
Doubting whether I could survive the weekends by myself!
Hmm...
Plus, I need to get a haircut SERIOUSLY.
Still dont see myself getting my first haircut here though.
Yea, Im a girl who stands by her rule!
And badly need supplies of her beauty product.
Yea, you may ask why can't you get there (Merlion city) instead?
Well, Im all with familiarity.
The price might almost round up more or less
BUT
So yea, there's a but there.
Going to do a lil shopping perhaps?
Nothing here suits my taste still.
Only a few.

And yet, the girlfriend's away for the weekend to JB
GREAT!!*
=|
Im in need of a shopping companion!
Arggh~
And I miss her of course
DUH~

bury me alive!

2009-09-07T23:16:00.003+08:00

Never have high hopes.
No matter how promising it is or how well the sun shines,
Cause' the next minute, it will definitely turns to dark shades,
followed by the murderous thunders that will make your day
MISERABLE!

The same goes with human emotions. Feelings.
It could just tear you apart when one is so vulnerable when
he/she has set high hopes on a promising day.
On countless days!

Sigh.

-end-

cant wait till its over!

2009-09-02T20:39:00.002+08:00

Miss me? No?
=(
Hmm..OKAY! *sigh*

Kay, kay. Reality check.
Sorry for the 'insignificant' post lately. NOT random kay!

Updates...
September's here, and Im SO NOT looking forward to it. Never did!
For the last month itself, I posted the most throughout my entire blog!
Amazing eh? Guess that bloggers got into me somehow! =b

Last year September *reflects*, I was just about to start my internship at the infamous tcc and that's when it all started!
Wow! It has been a year so soon? =(
I still missed and has been missing them so much after leaving.
Only applies to tcc cq! *wink*
Oh boy! All those memories as an intern working with the best people of all.
=)

My month of September started with an exam! Ergh~
How 'great' that is eh?
*hope that I don't flunk it*
Its over! Bleh~

Had dinner with love.
I SO need it, the company of course.
What were you thinking? *wonders*
And the after joke of September!
Haha.
That was fun. But pretty mean eh?
Nevermind, you never fail to cheer me up!
=)
*huggles~

does it suffice?

2009-08-31T01:25:00.004+08:00

Happiness is short-lived. At this moment of time, every single thing goes smoothly or rather routine in a good way of course. The next thing, your world suddenly turns upside down. Okay, that was a bit exaggerating but its true. Sigh. Guess you have to live up with the unexpected circumstances huh?

Life is like driving on a straight road. All along, the path goes smoothly with no potholes or any rough patch. Just smooth enjoying the scenery and all. Then on your way somehow, there's a bump or a stone which serves as a blockade but you managed to go through the obstacles with much effort. After that there's the road sign or a divulge road in which you have to choose which way to go. That simplifies option. Either its a turning on you right or left, it will bound to take you somewhere, just whether you managed to get where you're heading to, much futher or rather you make a good turn. Anyhow, there's no shortcut whatsoever, just that the journey is much shorter, that's all. Then there's also other external factor such as the weather, traffic jams and so much more. Hence, the road to the designated place takes you a longer time than you're expected it to be.

But life is all about enjoying the journey. Whether or not you get there is secondary. And of course not to perish! Duh~

p/s: non-related, I know but that's how it is.
pp/s: The Road Less Travelled-Robert Frost.

Never ever take ANYTHING for granted. Seriously!

matthew 6:34

2009-08-30T04:44:00.003+08:00

Intensifying ... Heart-wrenching...

The end.

huggles~

::So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will take care of itself.
Each day has enough trouble of its own::

grandma~

2009-08-29T03:23:00.003+08:00

Officially~! =)

dizzy spells~

2009-08-22T04:32:00.003+08:00

2 more weeks to the end of August!

3 weeks onwards of stressing out (not to the extent of pulling my hair!).

4 more weeks to the next 10.twelve! Yay~

Sigh. And to the sleepless to endure from now on. =\ Motivation! No slacking!
The laziness in me has taken to a great length and its becoming a habit now I guess? Hmm.
That includes the laziness of not uploading pictures of the recent graduation! Guess it doesn't only apply to blogging huh? Hmm.

Watch this space for pictures (hopefully!).

p/s: come back in 3 weeks time, kay?

=) Nights.

of research and libraries!

2009-08-12T02:05:00.003+08:00

If only the place of education that Im currently at could provide all they I need for my research!

AND that would have help A LOT as I could borrow those precious books back with a valid student ID of that insititution rather than photocopying it all the way! Im just so desperate just to take a peek at those e-journals and also e-FYP of past years students where I obviously need someone else's ID as Im not a student of that particular insititution!! =E

How frustrating and depressing can it be and to even think about it?! Yeesh~

I feel myself intruding other people's library (except public libraries of course!) and how inconvenient it proves to be (as you CANNOT borrow!) when you really need to. Head over to an infamous school which I truly consider at one point to change school with the girls. One even jokingly said that she'll be shifting to the library as her 'new place'. Haha. Funny that is. The resources over there are overwhelming to the extend that it fulfill our 'requirement' as a Hospitality and Tourism student! Awesome right? There's so much to read and this library had not fail us. Yet. Guess we'll be 'temporary' students for months to come.

Yet, I felt that our library has fail us in so many ways! What's the point of having a membership card if you cant fully utilise it? And also the size of it is pathethic compared to other school's libary. Geez. Isn't it a bit USELESS other than to secure you're identity that you're a student from this school? Sigh.

In which Im truly thankful for my boy who has been VERY VERY helpful to secure me a few books from this and that libraries! =) Probably need a couple of books more love.

*pray for a miracle*

Good night~

no boundaries~

2009-08-06T03:19:00.013+08:00

WARNING: Emo post ahead.

We only lived once. True!

And definitely no second chance in life to that. Wish there's a Pensieve (if only!) reviewing all those memories that has been with me for the past 21 years and 4 months.

Recently, I missed those 6 months of training in which has thought me lots and at the same time, changed my life, at least my perspective towards life.

*
I missed those times where I shouldnt take for granted of my time with my family members, especially with Grandma. All those sweet memories of nothings. Priceless.

*
I missed those days where me and Gracie would make time for each other especially those crazy moments on 'her' bridge. She has been my confidante and more to like a sister I never had.

*
I missed those high school days where it is definitely the best year of my school life. I missed being seventeen!

*

Even if I were to go back in time, I wouldn't change it. Just to catch a few glimpse of those sweet moments satisfy me enough.

Sadly, people come and go AND so does everything else. Nothing lasts forever. It is those memories of a lifetime that stays. Life never moves backward, only forward.

~life is not measured by the moment we take,
but by the moment that takes our breathe away~

p/s: DESPERATELY needs to add more 'moments' to my collection!! =)

yet another post..

2009-08-05T02:01:00.004+08:00

August!

Before July ends, August has already been pain in the neck for me theorictically. So NOT into August!

First of, web evaluation HAVE to be done before 14th.

MP first draft not done yet! Postphone meeting till next week. Supposingly one of the next following days! =E

'BEST' of all, 3rd term starts 31st August!! CRAP!! Wait, there's more. It's on every Monday morning at 8.30!! GREAT (sarcastically of course!) MONDAY blues!! Piff~

And and, first written exam on 1st Sept!! Life couldnt be any better now!

ONLY looking forward for the next coming Monday!! And and also the following weekends of 14th-17th. =)

That's all~

a simple week (ends)

2009-08-01T02:08:00.007+08:00

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday
Friday, Saturday, Saturday and Sunday~

(Black Eyed Peas - I Gotta Feeling)
=)

A Friday without a date!
How sad can that be? Hmm..
VERY!

Nevermind, I have Sunday to look forward to.
Yay~

Had an outing with the girls on Wednesday night.
Ladies night people.
Wee~
We had such fun of 3 hours non-stop dancing.
And we succeeded in tagging Karlin who insist that she's not properly dressed for the night!
Nah~we don't care anyhow.

In the end, we had so much fun!!

we had lotsa fun =]

2009-07-23T19:17:00.005+08:00

The first thing, obviously is to meet up with Gracie!! =) Had to hunt for 'the' dress, so she accompanied me on Monday afternoon. Bangsar! She made me tried out all sorts of dresses with different colour. And she made the right choice for me with the FIRST dress that she saw!! Awesome!

That was Monday.

Later in the evening, Gracie called and she decided to skip a couple of hours of Tuesday class due to the last minute birthday party this coming Saturday in which she need to get pressie! Second date!! =D

Tuesday. Head towards Imbi this time. Promised my boy some souvenirs but not KLCC! =b At the same time, Time Square was nearby and there's Krispy Kreme (kr-ram)! Not cream!! Blek.
Imbi area is one hell of a place to look for parking, but we did after the first round. While waiting for the lady in the car to reverse her car, this uncle who 'somehow' spotted the vacant lot decides to swerve in swiflty!! Damn it uncle! Cant you see that I had my left signal lights on although Im park right in the front? Intuition tells me at that time that he's going after it but I HONKED!! Yup! That's for STEALING other people's parking and not being a GENTLEMAN!! Piff~

Nevermind that. We head on to the busy coffee shop which is famous at the corner of Jalan Imbi and we had Siu Cheong Mee (Pork Intestine?). Not sure how's the exact translation for that though. Was fully packed with people who's there for their lunch from the area (mostly working class) and we keep switching places. Lunch was filling and I miss Malaysian food! =\ So much!!

After we both got our stuffs, head back home to prepare myself to attend the wedding. Quite far actually, plus Im unfamiliar with the place. Did my 'homework' in looking for the place and I WAS already AT the place but MISSED and decided to make a 'smart' left turn and ended up paying a RM1.50 toll heading towards KLCC!! Smart right?
Luckily I did found my way back and quickly change and met the bride before that! Lovely.

Eventually, I ended up being part of the speech thingy and it was okay. Dinner and everything was great and I think I enjoyed myself. =)

Went home with my feet killing me (Gracie's heels, how many inches eh?). Till now, I still feel the pain.

Flight the next day and amazingly I forgot my hard disk!! GREAT!! =|

edit: Was complaining the other day when mentioned on Breaking Dawn and
I have my own now!!
Hooray~ =)

double Fridays

2009-07-18T02:06:00.005+08:00

The usual, always have the urge to blog but end up NOT blogging!

Laziness. =b

Okay, I was INITIALLY going to post up pictures of last Friday date but had a rather disappointing meal over at tcc's IB. First time dining at a tcc outlet and it was really upsetting in the end.
The food and obviously the service. Me and my boy decided to have the 1-For-1 promotion and have been craving Seafood Aglio Olio ever since he had it without me the other day!! =(
(btw, he ALWAYS have NICE food all alone to himself, right?)

Chili Beef Soup.
One of our favourites!

The infamous Seafood Aglio Olio!
=D

Overly diluted Raspebrry Yoghurt Drink!

Perfect Irish Coffee
(double Irish, mind you!)

Devil-misu.
Tad disappointing. Hmm~

Got a wedding present for my friend. More to assembling it myself and it turn out PRETTY!!
=)

Seng & Ellie~

Watched HP6. Cant say it's awesome though, and yet again, over-rated. Mind you, Im truly a fan of Harry but yeah, sometimes, what you read isnt what you get on movies. Yeah, expected!

And its FRIDAY again today. Yes yes. Yet another Friday with love! =) Friday night are hard to come by given that he's NEEDED during work! Understood! So yeah, we had dinner at Swensen's but lots of food have to to pantang (avoid) especially ICE-CREAM or any cold like foods there is due to the cough after the flu and sore throat!
=|

It sucks when my coughs 'takes' over and I needed to nurse myself back to health for like months! I kid you not! Yeesh..
Anyhow, dinner was delicious. Moreover, I get to spend Friday evening with sweetie =)
Oh and dessert! Yummy~

Grilled Chicken Salad
(Love preferred the Caesar Salad, more to the dressing actually)

Curry Chicken Baked Rice!

Pepperoni and Cheese! Yum~

We never miss out
Sticky Chewy Chocolate with Butterscotch!
So sinful eh? Haha.

And tomorrow, Im finally heading home after a while over here.
Not to mention, in a bad state of health! =(
At one point of time, thought that it was H1N1. Thank GOD!!
But at the same time, with a heavy heart! 5 days..!! Hurmm..

Good night all.
Early coach tomorrrow.
Sleep well and sweet dreams
Tu-lu~

=)

Sunday morning =)

2009-07-12T17:19:00.003+08:00

Don't you just love Sunday morning..?

Well, I do (a LOT). Afterall, it's family day!

=)

*listening to Sunday morning by Maroon 5*

enjoy~

currently...

2009-07-11T22:56:00.004+08:00

Random-ness.

Current movie that I've watched.

Transformers

Ice Age 3

Current book Im reading

Daughter of the East

Current work/assignment

Get started on web evaluation

Get done and over with Introduction of MP by Wednesday (15th) =|

Other "current" task

Wedding gift

Dinner dress

Bus ticket on the 18th

With so much work to do, her health gives way! Damn it!
=E

*takes med and head to bed*

Good night all!

inspiration - twilight

2009-07-08T03:02:00.005+08:00

Life is like a book.

I wonder any philosopher said that, cuz that's what come to my mind now.

Book. It's the beginning of an end. Always. Ever wonder how a person's life has been written out all so clearly, that one day, at the end of a chapter, it ENDS! Well, every thing that has a life ends in some way, one or another.

If you keep track, I have mentioned it earlier. Any event or object would just trigger me to pen this down and start thinking. Somehow, Twilight affects me real bad. SERIOUSLY. As in twilight Twilight. Never thought that I would be so INTO the whole thing after twilight. My first impression on the movie: SO OVER-RATED (that's my new word now). Everything to me seems so over-rated nowadays. Haha. That's SO me. Never mind that.

Apparently, Stephenie Mayer has done herself good in producing her work into a movie. Something that caught attractions of so many people, especially girls, who go ga-ga over it! Me included! =b Well, I just finished Eclipse. I've only got the last book left, Breaking Dawn. After that, then what? The story ends, right? Damn true. But it has totally make an impact on me like I said before. Yes, it is fiction, but then, it makes me think, in a way. Inspiring. Been totally sucked into their world but yet, I do find that in real life, it does paints certain similarity. For every girl, they have their own version of Edward. I have mine, of course. =) Well, he totally rock my world! Lucky!

So, what I was saying was about a book. Life would come to an end when each one's story ends. And another takes turn. It's a repeat process then. Over and over again. How does mine end? Or how does it evolve, what 's the story like especially? At some point of my life, I would perhaps be my own author and write a book of my life perhaps? Doubt it would even be published or even a best-seller, but yeah, I live my life the way my life should be or I think it should be.

Sometimes, when I have my time alone, thinking always occupy me without knowing. I used to be SO sure of what I want to do in my life, but then, at one point of time, Im lost. Confused! What do I want in life? What do I want to do? More important, what do I want?? Sigh.

I wish sometimes that I could divulge myself into a world of my own! Simple. I wish!

Words with atmosphere
Twilight - Any growing darkness
New Moon - Darkest time of night
Eclipse - A loss or blocking of light
Breaking Dawn - A new beginning, day breaking into the night

Quote: After all this ends, its like saying goodbye to an old friend, permanently!

thoughts...deep thoughts...

2009-07-02T21:24:00.003+08:00

*thinking*

It happens all the time. The trigger of something or someone in which I've come across with, where I decide to blog immediately after.

Lately, things had started to be in a nice and comfortable pace - e.g. school! Submission of this and that really stressed me out the past few weeks. Had to deal with the sleeping disorder, juggle between the amount of assignment (prioritize at the same time) and undecided about meals especially. Life's been a bit crazy but yeah, made through it and now, the result awaits. Hopefully, things DOES starts to get better.

I'm not someone who whine about the how things work BUT, yes I have my buts there, its good to know why always. Suddenly I feel emo. Gah~

Blame it on Criminal Minds. It was my boy who got me hooked to this series anyway. But it's totally awesome. Awesome makes me think of Michelle. But heck, she's one AWESOME girl that I've meet so far!! =) And I missed her. *ahem ahem* Got distracted somehow. =b Back to the subject, yeah, a strings of things does seems to have its own accord to influence me somehow. It always happen like I said. Not sure whether it's a good or bad thing. =|

That's all~
=)

Criminal Minds.

black friday

2009-06-26T18:05:00.006+08:00

It is a black friday!

"Two Lost Icon In A Day" "Two Icons for Generation X"

When I read the headlines of the news stating 'Michael's Dead' I was dumb-founded for a while! Is that really true or some kinda joke? Well, it turns out he really is GONE!!

Oh my~ =(
What a day to begin with with the death of a legendary pop icon. Since then, every major websites featured the news of Michael's death! Its tragic! Really. Apparently it was cardiac arrest who got hold of him. And he's only 50!!

Next, tv icon Farah Fawcett.
Or better known as one of the 1970s Charlie's Angels'. She was battling with cancer in which I came across on The Star. A few months back, I last read about her filming a reality tv show about her battle with cancer. It was totally a devastating moment for me although I might not know her that well but it's heartbreaking. They were like from my parent's time. She was 62.

It's still quite difficult to fathom the news of such sudden deaths. Moreover, they were icons! Well, people do come and go. Its the impact of them which they inflict on everyone to such remembrance.

May their souls rest in peace.

*that reminds me of Grandma too. May her soul rest in peace as well. I miss you so much M!*

such good times!

2009-06-20T03:27:00.013+08:00

Well, well, well...

A sense of relieve (not so, with one more assignment to go) after the presentation was over!
Finally!

Well, let's just say that it hasn't been going well for me for the last couple of weeks!
Excruciating!

But yea, as it all began to wind down a lil (with things back on track I supposed) and it wasn't so bad afterall (I wish).

Strings of events for Friday 19.6 of 09.
1. Headed to Makansutra with the girls. Was totally a wonderful moment we had earlier on as we managed to submerged ourselves into the calming wind over at Esplanade. It was definitely a moment of relaxation for all of us. Neither of us got our beauty sleep except Karlin! =) But we did enjoy ourselves and giggled for that few hours after that!

2. Finally met Matt online for like after SO long! We had so much to share about the current situations (more to updates actually!)

crossroads.

3. As usual, as a blog reader (blogder), Michelle's blog never fail to keep me entertain =). Pictures! In which both sweetie and Zix were part of it! I miss CQ so much ALL THE TIME but sadly was only a part of them for that 6 months!! How I wish things could be a lot different!!

courtesy of
{ riddle of red;} | the beauty of randomness

just wanna go home..

2009-06-03T04:15:00.002+08:00

Again.

I cant sleep. It awful..seriously!
The minute I lie down, Im as wide awake as I can be.
Tired but I just wont sleep!
Help!

Next thing I know, tears rolling down my cheek.

I really want to be in a place where I belong to. Comfortable with.
I don't want to talk to myself anymore.
Im afraid I'll go crazy. Not joking!
Help!

Why is this happening to me?

I miss home.
I dont want to do anything.
I just want to sleep. Can You not take that away from me too?
That's the only thing left of me which keeps me sane!

Please.

I have nothing to look forward for anymore.
I dont know what I want anymore.
I can no longer ignore my feelings anymore.
What more can I do to make myself feel better?

*I didnt want to show my feelings here, but I could no longer bottle up or just keep it. It has become so unfamiliar to me now. I wish for a way to change things. I hate this and I could no longer bear it. Its painful.*

hate having dinner with myself!

2009-05-31T20:24:00.004+08:00

Stomach was growling non-stop while I was still at the library!
Embarassing!
=S
So, I headed towards Bugis to grab a quick dinner while Im trying to fight off the cold.

*tap on my shoulder*
There's this China woman who popped out of nowhere introducing me to a modelling thingy in which I thought of sweetie immediately. He was approached by the same type of people a few months ago! What a coincidence. She explained herself and blah..blah..blah.. But I was pretty straight-forward that I gave her my number when she asked me that! DAMN!! And now I'll be harrased by some stranger! Pretty stupid isn't it.

To take my mind off it, I wonder around for a while with an emotion-less face. Mind was total blank.
*why the hell did I gave my number?*
*what am I gonna do?*
*where to have dinner?*
Hmm.

After contemplating for a while (seems forever to me!) with myself, I headed down to Starbucks and grabbed a muffin with my usual Raspberry drink! Dinner fixed!

Need internet seriously! I hate being outside alone! =(

good morning~

2009-05-25T04:48:00.003+08:00

Insomnia.

Well, apparenty its making a coming back lately due to irregular sleep patterns. I did tried to make myself sleep but cant. Lots has been going through my mind after the boyfriend's Iphone wont restart! =| Eek!

Strees

Not sure what Im so stress about BUT Im really stress. There's plenty to share. Always have the urge to blog but when Im actually doing it, BLANK! Isnt that stressful..?

School.

It's been a erm..(counting) nearly at the end of May, erm...(still counting) my 3rd week of class in which Im only attending once a week? Being a final year student seems so 'normal' except that its not the kind of school life I expect. Mostly research, assignments, due dates, research, assignments and due dates! How boring can that be but that's life!

Friends.

I miss my dear friends. Not trying to sound paranoid here but Im in need of a group of friends desperately. Matt's leaving this Tuesday and won't be seeing in for the next coming 5 months! It's only FB that Im relying on these days as the instantenous means of communcations with friends in my list. Never could have imagine myself as someone who's DESPERATELY checking her FB account all the time! What kind of life am I living nowadays..?
(which reminds me of Lisa Simpson who's constantly alone when it comes to friends)

I need to get out! But where to..?

(need to sleep so bad as she's got class tomorrow...oh wait, its already Monday morning.)
*explains Monday blues! I hate MONDAYs!!!*

finally...it's done!

2009-05-24T04:12:00.002+08:00

Gosh! I've never liked to edit those html! It drives me a lil crazy now. Yes, I know, I may not be smart enough to do it but what the heck? I think I shall get it done once and for all after much attempts of failure!

Finally!

With the right colour and everything, Im truly satisfied with the endless struggling of nearly a few hours now! Tada~ My new blog layout with how it should respect my taste to it! I feel a sense of achivement within me! Haha.

The result is truly amazing as Im so in love with the layout right now! Thanks to Amanda @ Blogger Buster who's behind the wonderful layout! Im as happy as a lil girl who mummy promised to get her favourite ice-cream in which she did! Yay~

(*off to admire yours truly layout!)

p/s: Do you like it too..? =)

empty

2009-05-10T00:21:00.003+08:00

A few more days, lil girl's gonna start school. BUT she's way behind classes (nearly 4) and she doesn't know what to expect. Out of no where, a sense of emptiness creeps into her leaving her to ponder her existence in a place where she has been for the past 6 months now. The familiarity of the environment no londer seems to hold up but yet seems to be fading very slowly without her realizing that. How lonely.

Nevertheless, her life was resolve in a whirlwind way which she doesn't even have the time to take 5 and look back to what has been going through. Sadly enough, she longs for the sense of familiarity she used to have all along with her best friend; more to a sister to her. Both girls always make an attempt to catch up with each other no matter what. The shoppings, time spent at Sri Wawasan bridge, and also lotsa other crazy happy times that sustained their friendship this long. Seriously, she's missing her dear girlfriend lately. Very much!

Lately, things has been a lil busy for the girlfriend. As her bestie, she understands well and in fact, it has always been this way. While one is busy, the other isn't. Nothing to fuss about there. We truly understand each other. Sigh. But it seems to her somehow, that all of a sudden, the urgency to be together with the girlfriend seems to surface. At this point of time, it sucks NOT to be with 'the' best friend of yours in which you confide and share everything with her and just be crazy! No doubt, there so much to talk about!

P/S: You're the reason of this post. Couldn't help tearing now! I miss you hun~

reminiscence.s

2009-04-22T02:58:00.003+08:00

While I was flipping through the pages of my usual journal, which I don't write in it anymore, it got me thinking somehow!

Looking back on how I was in the past, as a daughter, a granddaughter, a student, a girlfriend. I really loathe myself on the latter part. Too naive. Always letting others to have their ways over me. Always giving in. I really fail as a girl. Completely!

Well, I wouldn't want to discuss about that further. It hurts badly thinking back of how I am as a person. All so easy. People do get a hold of my weakness and manipulate me! Right. End of topic.

Lately, an episode of a TVB show has me in tears all over. It was a scene where a grandma got knocked over by a van while trying to cross the road to get hold of a cab where her granddaughter was a bit further talking on her cell while hailing effortlessly for a cab. Grandma was just trying to help but in the end, it was a tragic accident. Within split second, it brought me back memories of grandma.

I seldom talked to her about anyone. Heartbreaking. She was my best friend! We're like mother and daughter more. She was my heart and soul. I could just talk to her about everything! No secrets. I really wish she's still here. There's so much going on in my life and I certainly don't want her to miss out. Not a single bit! Half a year more marks two. Ma, I missed you! Can you hear me?

Huggles~

Love you...

9 days later..

2009-03-27T23:15:00.000+08:00

may all wishes comes true... =)

twenty-1

2009-03-18T23:59:00.000+08:00

u mean everythin' to me

2009-02-10T16:47:00.003+08:00

second~

nice n lovely =)

we make it through 1st..

2009-01-17T12:00:00.003+08:00

It's been a week since 10-twelve. Our day.

Happy times do passed quickly!
Looking forward for the next tenth.

=)

eventually, it comes around =)

2008-12-31T23:15:00.005+08:00

Okay!
What happened this Christmas?

Firstly, my 1st time ever NOT celebrating with friends or close ones'.

Secondly, I was looking forward to be with him.

Thirdly, work got in the way as usual, so, was pretty exhausted as well.

BUT

He gave me this!
It's last year's Special Edition of Evian by French designer Christian Lacroix!! Ever since I saw this last year, I had made up my mind that I would own that one day, but I didn't managed to get it.

Eventually, it comes around this year with a HUGE surprise from sweetie on Christmas morning! =) Aww~ Quite speechless actually as I found out what I was getting for Christmas. Earlier, he gave me JPG's. Now this. Isn't that amazing..? 2 bottles in a month?? That's crazy but I was really really happy. Thanks so much sweetie. You truly make my day.

Mine is the same as JPG's in which comes with a paper bag instead of the box. It's the pret-a-porter's version, not the haute as that's quite LIMITED! =S

p/s: Gracie was saying the other day, "Why keep giving you Evian?". Cuz I heart it a lot! =) Yup.

Christmas-sy

2008-12-16T12:24:00.003+08:00

It's that time of the year in which I look forward to. The only thing that keeps me going the entire time just to wait for it. Hopefully things won't blow up and I get to spend quality time celebrating or perhaps with that someone. Still hopeful that he'll be able to be with me.

Anyhow, Mum and Bro came last few days. We were totally on the shopping mood. Bro was occupied with his photo-taking all around town in which his skills fascinates me tremendously. While I was out the other day, something caught my eye!

dearly beloved~

Without hesistating, I asked Bro to get it for me in return for my Christmas pressie!! OMFG! I've been waiting all this while for 2 freaking years, and its MINE!! Gosh! I was utterly speechless for a moment and I felt so HAPPY after all this time, scouting for all over the places while Im back in M'sia. Probably the best Christmas pressie I've ever had in my life. It's a miracle. =)

At the same time, Im down with fever yet again. Couple of weeks back, nearly everyone at work seems to be getting sick and eventually, this month tends to be the busiest month of the year. Somehow, it's my turn. Sigh. It's best that I don't fall sick (again) next week as I've prepared myself for the entire week. Speaking of which, I've still yet to to get pressies. Yikes! 8 more days to go.. =S

save you

2008-11-26T11:53:00.000+08:00

Simple Plan - New Music - More Music Videos

~enjoy.. =)

..taking chances..

it takes [two] to tango

sane. insane?

11th month of year 2010

1.2.3

Potrait of an ISFJ

Portrait of an ISFJ - Introverted Sensing Feeling Judging(Introverted Sensing with Extraverted Feeling)

The Nurturer

when lainey meets gracie.

it shall always be

a breathe of life~

just when you have too much time in hand..

112

Joys of laughter

oh so sleepy..

knocking through the cottage door of Surrey..

a unusual saturday

killing me softly & slowly

wherever, whenever, whatever!

something to ponder..

the long awaited day =)

humour me please..?

how true is it..?

what shall i do?

drained out!

ICT

weekly update..

100th post tribute to the boyfriend =)

yummy!

its been quite a while now..

it gets the better of me..

of rojak and beyond!

the jealous pot

really something, isnt it?

what shall it be?

68% innocent? really..?

somewhere i belong

double-two

utter disappointment!

hooray~

mr fredrickson

just different`

wrong timing..

needs excitement!

a brand new start..

of boys & girls..

months ago..

CONGRATULATIONS & CELEBRATIONS =)

my first for twenty-ten

what shall it be?

i cant wait!

nothing much about..

little thoughts

humour of the day..

she's only human..

all in one

a special one~

its MY season~christmas.sy! =)

it shines, thn rains~& it keeps repeating!

Christmassy~

Surprise!!

lovely butterflies~

B with a double K!

another sunday

(de) anticipate?

it's all in your head!

its been a while now..hmm*

bury me alive!

cant wait till its over!

does it suffice?

matthew 6:34

grandma~

dizzy spells~

of research and libraries!

no boundaries~

yet another post..

a simple week (ends)

we had lotsa fun =]

double Fridays

Sunday morning =)

Portrait of an ISFJ - Introverted Sensing Feeling Judging
(Introverted Sensing with Extraverted Feeling)